


Holding Hands

by chimaeracabra



Category: HIM (Band)
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Smut, H.I.M. - Freeform, RPF, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2016-02-04
Packaged: 2018-05-08 19:52:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 38,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5510888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chimaeracabra/pseuds/chimaeracabra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ville falls in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had this bubbling up from the depths of my brain for a little over a week. He's a handsome voice to hear and pretty easy on the eyes. So. Merry Christmas.

            "Ole hyvä." She stands there awkwardly, comb in hand, staring up into a set of sleepy, verdant eyes, the shadow of faint crow's feet beginning to appear in his porcelain skin. She pauses combing with a nervous hand, which actually begins to tremble. Ville's eyes widen with what looks like impatience.   
            "Eh, minun kahvi," Ville states, snapping his fingers and pointing away to the side at the table where moments ago, a woman with black hair named Olivia had placed a cup of steaming black coffee. All Tatianna knew was that Olivia was the band's manager; she had been too distracted trying to straighten up Ville's sweaty bed head to know more than the fact that he and the dark-haired woman were conversing—more like arguing—in Finnish. Ville shakes his head as if he had been in a daze (he sure looked the part).   
            "Fuck— anteeksi—sorry. I was so busy yelling at my manager that I forgot you don't speak Finnish." Ville smiles shyly. Tatianna laughs.   
            "Forgive me," he says, extending an almost abnormally long leg in the direction of his caffeine. Tatianna had made a turn towards it, but Ville shook his head and apologized.   
            "You are not a servant—I misspoke. I'm sorry."   
After a loud yawn, Ville picks up the coffee cup and turns with it in his hand. He pulls the lid off to smell it, and seeming satisfied, dips the tip of his tongue into the hot liquid. He winces through clenched teeth after scalding himself. Ville places the cup back on the table and resumes his place in front of Tatianna. He bows his head once more so that she is able to reach his hair. She grins nervously.   
            "It's—it's okay, Ville. I think that looks alright."   
            "You sure, sweetheart? I'm sorry. I didn't have time to shower before this shoot. We went straight from the plane to the hotel, the bus, to here," Ville explains. He seemed to be fond of the word "sweetheart", and Tatianna doesn't take it as his attempt to flirt with her. Regardless, her heart still flutters. She nods, tucking the comb into her back pocket and clasping the camera around her neck. Ville stands to his full height then, taking a few steps back so that the white background receives his tall shadow.   
            "Is this far enough, sweetheart?" Ville asks. Tatianna's heart skips a beat as Ville tucks his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. She's glad that she's probably too tan from the ending of a Spanish summer for Ville to notice.

            "I'm sorry—what was your name?" Ville adds apologetically.

            "Tatianna." She grins, feeling her nerves work more. She had known about H.I.M. since she was thirteen years old, going through her awkward goth phase in high school, but never knew more than a few songs and was never a serious fan. But seeing Ville standing before her now, suddenly she's very grateful for her job.

            "Tatia?" Ville says. She opens her mouth, ready to correct him, but he continues, "That's beautiful. Well, good morning, Tatia. I apologize for my grumpiness and lack of coordination. I tend to be this way before I get my coffee." She laughs a second, pulling the camera around her neck up to her eyes. When Ville looks into the lens with the most smoldering expression, Tatia just about dies. She assures Ville that he's fine where he is and begins snapping shots.

            "So," she begins, wanting it not to be totally silent. She also figures that she may as well get some background knowledge on the band, considering that this photo shoot is part of a week-long process in which she will be covering the band during the final shows of its career, "What would you say has been your biggest achievement as a band?"

            "Hmm…well, everything that I have done. Everything that— _we_ have done—if I'm to speak for the rest of us who are missing at the moment," Ville explains, gazing at the ground momentarily, lifting a finger to his chin and scratching it.

            "I stopped drinking," he adds, looking up and smiling. Tatianna continues snapping photos.   "And I also gave up smoking what seems like for good. I haven't had a cigarette in about eight months. I've fallen off the bandwagon a couple of times, I'll admit."

            "Congratulations," Tatianna says somewhat absently, adjusting her position to capture Ville as he turns to the side.

            "If you meant to ask _me_ specifically, I guess I am proud of the fact that I…I'm leaving behind a legacy with all of the songs I've written and helped to create with some of my closest friends. People will remember the songs—and probably us as well—fondly until the end of time."

 

 

            Tatianna's first H.I.M. concert leaves her in a state of rekindled love for music. Ville on stage is a very different Ville from the man she had begun to photograph earlier. He seemed more alive and less solemn, more free. Watching him sing and speak to the crowd was more than inspiring, the chemistry he shared with Linde and the rest. They were in perfect harmony. The following afternoon, Tatia leaves her desk at the magazine to go for her second shoot. When she makes it to the bus, she doesn't find the band, but their manager greets her at the door and leads her towards the venue.

            "Ville's back in the dressing room, if you want to get a few more shots before he gets sweaty as hell," Olivia explains, pulling the door to the venue open. Tatianna laughs a moment.

            "He's alone?" Tatianna asks.

            "Yes; everyone is out for a little drink before the show. Ville doesn't drink, you know. Not anymore."

            "Oh, yes. Are you sure he won't mind?"

            "Not at all. Frankly, I don't care, not after he's had me running around for his coffee every day since we got to Spain," Olivia says, meaning it, but smiling nonetheless.

            "Go down the hall, I think it's the last door on the left down there," Olivia explains, pointing down some stairs. For a moment, Tatianna feels as if she's in a horror movie, being led into a trap of some kind.

            "Thanks."

            "Uh, show is in…" Olivia pauses to glance at her watch, "Twenty-six minutes. He needs to be free at least five minutes before to warm up his voice, okay?"

            "I understand."

            "Knock yourself out," Olivia adds before walking away. Tatianna walks down the steps and into the hall. She can hear what sounds like Nirvana playing, the sound sharpening as she makes her way to the dressing room. She pauses just before the door. The sound of Ville cursing in frustration lets her know she's in the right place. She opens the door, forgetting all manners and not bothering to knock. As she rounds the corner, she snaps a photo simultaneously. She had wanted to get as many candids as possible. Ville always seemed to be aware of his surroundings, and she hadn't quite seen him entirely in his own element. Ville pauses in mid action trying to light a cigarette; she had startled him.

            "Oh, hello…Come in," Ville says calmly, chucking the cigarette behind him over the couch and tucking a green lighter into the pocket of his jeans. He smiles sideways without teeth.

            "Sorry about that little ambush. Part of this article requires candid shots. I figured it would be okay since the door was propped open…Are you allowed to smoke in here?" Tatianna asks, looking around the white-walled room, "I thought you told me during the shoot the other day that you finally quit." Ville laughs unsurely.

            "I don't know, honestly. That wasn't a concern of mine. I just thought I could have one little smoke without anyone noticing. Actually, I'm glad you caught me—I feel shame. Now I won't do it. I won't let you make a liar out of me." Tatianna laughs.

            "Come, Tatia. Sit with Ville now and listen," Ville says, waving her over to the unfolded pull-out couch where he had sat up from a reclining position. She generally despised anyone who would refer to himself in the third person, but Ville seemed to be about the only person she had ever met who could make it sound not pretentious. She starts towards the couch, spotting Ville's phone on a small table; it's where the music had been coming from. Nirvana makes for easy background noise as Ville closes his eyes.

            "I got the cigarette from the sound check guy. I knew I should have just walked right by as soon as I saw him smoking outside."

            "Well, I saved you."

Ville laughs, "You did, Tatia." She smiles to herself, still not bothering to correct Ville about her name.

            "I'm exhausted today. I don't know how I'm going to get through this show. If I fall asleep at the mic, please don't document it." Tatianna laughs and Ville opens his eyes, lifting his head off the back of the couch. He looks pleased with himself for having made her laugh. She feels insignificant beside his magnificently long legs as he pulls a knee to his chest.

            "I really appreciate your patience with me this entire time. I haven't been off to a good start this week," Ville admits.

            "Really? From what I saw last night, that's not true," Tatianna admits. Ville smiles that shy smile, the one many people do when they're nervous. She begins wondering whether Ville is as taken with her as she is with him.

            "You are too kind, Tatia."

Ville was smitten with the thickness of her accent from the moment that she spoke to him. She had even correctly pronounced his name the first time he heard her say it. Her dark hair falls like a curtain to her elbows as she turns something on her camera absently, biting a thick bottom lip.

            "Have you lived in Spain all your life?" Ville asks curiously. Tatiana smiles and a set of dimples cause deep indentations in both her cheeks. Her brown eyes melt him on the inside.

            "Yes. But I studied abroad in Sweden one year for school, mmm…almost two years ago. It's right next door to Finland, but I've never been."

            "Yeah, it is. I bet you'll like it there," Ville says, knowing that the end of the tour will bring them to the homeland, Tatianna following to shoot at the final show.

            "I actually have friends in Sweden, from when I visited. I plan to visit them sometime in the near future."

            "Maybe you should drop by Finland," Ville suggests.

            "Maybe I should."

Tatianna's perfectly white teeth continue to glimmer. Little does Ville know, this is Tatianna's nervous smile, the one she always has when talking to someone she likes. Immediately, she had been drawn in by his kindness. It was hard not to fall for. A moment passes between them. Ville looks like he's waiting for something then, an almost hopeful look. Tatianna fidgets with the camera in her hands. And then it happens. Ville's kiss is not what she would have imagined, but better. He practically massages Tatianna's lips with his own. When she feels his fingers wind into her hair, she pulls back. Ville's eyes are still closed when she looks at his face. Lake of Fire meets Tatianna's ears and she smiles at the coincidence that she had felt fire between herself and Ville. He looks at her plainly now, as if he had _not_ just kissed her.

            "This is unprofessional of me. But I couldn't help myself. Tatia, that was…I'm…" Ville's eyes read her face frantically. She kisses him back, to Ville's surprise. His hand travels to her hip, a breath catching in his throat. He moans beneath her lips and Tatianna pulls back again. Blood swells beneath her cheeks. Ville looks more aroused than she had expected him to. He grins without teeth.

            "You are full of surprises," he says quietly. She can tell from the look on his face that he likes it.

            "Damn…I shouldn't do this," he says to himself, looking Tatianna up and down.

            "This isn’t like me—I'm not this type of guy."

            "What type of guy?"

            "The kind that uses the fact that he's a rock star to take advantage of girls who deserve better than the likes of himself."

Tatianna blushes madly.

            "I _am_ an adult," she assures him, "And…I don't think that you were taking advantage of me. But I'm not that type of woman," she says, grinning slyly. Ville smiles slowly.

            "What type of woman?"

            "The kind that drops her panties for a one-night stand just because the guy is attractive."

            "You think I'm attractive?" Ville asks, cocking a brow. They laugh simultaneously then. The laughing persists longer than she thought it would, Ville keeling over somewhat. His laugh is cute, but somewhat painful to listen to, as if Ville couldn't breathe. She finds herself glad that she interrupted him before he had the chance to smoke that cigarette. Colour has made its way to Ville's cheeks and he looks more alive by the time the pair stop laughing.

            "If I asked, would you allow me to take you out to dinner?" Ville asks.

            "Well…I'm waiting for you to ask," Tatia says. She tilts her head to the side in anticipation. Ville fights the urge to kiss her again.

            "Just dinner. I swear I'm not only trying to get into your knickers." Tatianna laughs.

 

            Since the band has the following day off, Ville requests to take Tatianna to dinner that evening. She had spent more than enough time the previous night photographing Linde and Migé from the front of the stage. Tatianna gazes out her bedroom window, curler still in hand, as the sound of a taxi pulling up in front of her house meets her ears. The sun is setting, but still out enough that she can make out the top of Ville's head as he starts towards her front door. She hurries down the stairs, just as he rings the bell. When Tatianna pulls the door clear open, Ville looks a little bit surprised, his eyes wide.

            "Tatia," he says breathlessly. She reaches for her purse on the small table by the door.

            "We're going dancing, aren’t we?" she asks, smiling. Ville seems at a loss for words and she begins to wonder what's wrong with him. She's so beautiful that he had to stop and stare for a moment.

            "You look amazing. Am I under dressed?" he asks, sounding somewhat worried.

            "Thank you. No—it will do," she reassures, checking her hair in the mirror for a few seconds before turning to give him the once over. He's wearing a red, velvet blazer and black trousers with matching loafers. He had even straightened his hair, which fell a bit past his shoulders.

            "You look good, too."

            "I hope so."

She starts towards the door, Ville turning to the side so that she can close it. She realizes that he'd been standing there with both hands behind his back.

            "What are you hiding?" she asks, standing on her tiptoes with a grin. Ville smiles somewhat shyly.

            "I," he begins, pulling a bouquet of carnations from behind his back and handing them to her, "Saw this lovely little stand on my way over and had to stop and get some flowers."

            "Ville, these are beautiful."

He laughs lightly.

            "Let me put them in a vase and some water before we go," Tatianna adds, reaching into her small purse for her keys. Ville takes in the sight of her once again. In her form fitting red dress and Louboutins, he finds her breathtaking. Ville stands there twinkly eyed while Tatianna enters the house to put the flowers away. He stands in the doorway, listening to the sound of water running, Tatianna's heels clicking on a tile floor. She starts back towards the door, smiling at him in the doorway.

            "Let's go. I could use some fun," she states. Ville lightly places a hand in the small of her back on their way to the taxi.

 

            Tatianna admitted to not being much of a drinker, ordering a San Pellegrino and water to  go with her food. The lively music and lights make it harder for Ville to hear her voice as she tells him a bit about herself. She leans in closer so that he can hear. He tucks a lock of curled brown hair out of the way and she blushes. All he knows is that he's enjoying her company, and the myriad of flavors in everything he eats send his tongue on a journey. After a while at their table trying to hear one another, Tatianna stands, pulling Ville by the arm and leading him outside.

            "Fresh air," is all he can hear her say. Just then, the band starts to play something mellow. Tatianna pauses halfway out the door, causing Ville to bump into her from behind. She nearly teeters over the step there when Ville grabs her waist firmly. She had gasped slightly at the suddenness of her movements. Ville immediately softens his grip, relieved when Tatianna turns to look up at him with a grin.

            " _Just_ when we step out, right?" she asks. Ville laughs. He eyes the atmosphere where a few tables for two sit beneath trellises entwined with roses and little lights. The sun has completely set, and a few couples are visible slow dancing under the stars.

            "Well, we came to dance. Let's dance, Ville," Tatianna says invitingly, clutching Ville's hand and making her way to a clearing where there's enough space for the two of them. Ville wraps his arms around her waist and enjoys the comfort of her warmth.

            "I must admit, I'm not the best dancer," he says.

            "Then why did you want to come here?" she laughs. Ville shrugs, laughing. He likes having an excuse to be this close to her, regardless.

            "I didn't want you to think that I'm boring," he says. Tatianna can't tell whether he's joking or serious, but he smiles and she rests both hands on his shoulders.

            "Well, it's slow. We'll be okay," she promises. The guitar filling Ville's ears is more romantic than he had expected. He stands there swaying with Tatianna in his arms. She smells of something sweet, he notices then. The gentle wind blowing passes Tatianna's bare knees, whipping her dress about. She doesn't want this dance to end. Ville sighs pleasantly and she sinks her head into his deflated chest.

            "When I made it to my hotel last night, I couldn't wait to see you," Ville admits. Tatianna looks up at him and he smiles toothlessly.

            "Is that odd? I barely know you."

            "If I'm honest, I couldn't wait to see you either, Ville."

His heart jumps.

            "I like it here," he says, dipping Tatianna slowly, very low to the ground. One of her hands wraps warmly around his neck and a tuft of hair falls into Ville's eye. He laughs quietly.

            "I won't drop you, sweetheart," he promises, noting how tightly she'd begun to grip his arm.

            "I'm stronger than I look," he adds, not wanting to release the petite, warm body in his hands. Tatianna smiles large enough that her dimples appear. In his nearness, Ville's eyes seem brighter than the stars in the sky above. He brings Tatianna slowly to a standing position.

            "I trust you," she assures him. Ville realizes then that he's falling mercilessly in love, and it isn't just the Spanish love song playing in the background. The only word he understands is amor, and he would have said something sweet to her in Spanish had he been able to speak it. Tatianna can't bear to waste another moment; she stands on her tiptoes, and regardless, only makes it to Ville's chin to kiss him. He laughs almost soundlessly. Her lipstick leaves a mark in his flesh and she smiles at it.

            "Do you want me to kiss you?" he asks. His tone is so innocent, yet his gaze is fiery with desire. Tatianna only looks up to him hopefully. An array of spices from their meal meets Tatianna's lips once more when Ville's open mouth makes contact with hers. He's not shy at all about exploring her, his fingertips digging into her hips, tongue tasting her aggressively. A few seconds pass and Tatianna is just about ready to have Ville take her where they stand. To her dismay, he breaks the kiss. Breathlessly, he says her name. His hands are on her rear now, but she doesn't mind.

            "What's wrong?" she asks.

            "Nothing…" Ville's waist shifts backwards away from her several inches; it wasn't his belt buckle that she felt against her stomach. In fact, he wasn't even wearing a belt. He grins without teeth, allowing his hands to rest chastely at her waist.

            "Remember when I told you what kind of guy I'm not?"

            "Yes, I recall." Ville takes a deep breath, holding it in for a moment.

            "Well, if we kiss like that too long, I fear that I will ask you to come back to my hotel room," he admits. The depth of his voice is enough to make Tatianna wet.

            "I wouldn't think poorly of you for that."

Ville's eyes soften and he looks as if he's struggling with every fiber of his being not to change his mind.

            "I would think poorly of _myself_ , Tatia," Ville admits. She goes in to kiss him again, her lips grazing his chin. Ville laughs. Touching her to begin with made him hard, but he wanted to think with the head on his shoulders and not the one below his waist.

            "I wouldn't be ashamed if you fucked me," Tatianna says quietly enough that only Ville can hear. He smiles, returning a dirty gaze for about two seconds.

            "It has nothing to do with shame, sweetheart. I want to see you again, Tatia. I really, _really_ do. But I don't want it to be like that. I don't enjoy one-night stands…I would rather see whether we're made for each other."

There are parts of Tatianna that Ville _knows_ are made for him. The attraction is there physically, but he reminds himself of how much it had hurt to have his heart broken by rushing into things in the past.

            "Okay," Tatianna says, meaning it. Ville feels a weight lift off his shoulders.

            "Just…" he trails off, getting lost in her chocolate eyes, swaying absently to the music. She reaches up and wipes at his chin with her thumb where her lipstick had marked him.

            "Oh, I made a mess of you," she says.

            "Did you?" he asks.

            "My makeup is all over your face." She can't help but laugh as she wipes it off.

            "That's alright, sweetheart. I'll never wash this chin again."

He earns another laugh from her.

            "Sit back and let's enjoy this ride, eh?" Ville asks. Tatianna nods, closing her eyes and resting her head in his chest again. The music continues and they dance until their hands are sweaty on each other and they could both use a glass of water. When they leave, Ville pulls open the door of a taxi for Tatianna. Before he can tell the driver where to go, Tatianna pipes up. He can't understand what she's saying, but the cab pulls away.

            "Was there somewhere else you wanted to go?" he asks.

            "It's a nice night. I wanted to show you something. It's a surprise."

He trusts Tatianna's smile. She moves over closer to Ville and rests her head on his shoulder.

            "I think you'll like," she yawns.

He holds her hand, watching the night pass them by. When the car stops, Tatianna steps out of her side, followed by Ville. She asks the driver to wait there for a few minutes.

            "Close your eyes," she says, clutching Ville's hand. He laughs and does as she says, the scent of salt meeting his nostrils. He can already hear the waves crashing and feel the ground beneath his feet become softer. Tatianna brings him closer before stopping.

            "Look," she says. The moon is full and round, bright, and seemingly very close as it sits above the dark horizon.

            "It's beautiful," he says. Tatianna kicks off her shoes and takes a seat, pulling Ville to sit beside her. They get lost in conversation, losing time when the cab begins to honk nearby. Tatianna turns around to wave him off.

            "It's okay. We're not far from my house. We might as well walk. It's too nice out," she explains. Ville finds himself feeling carefree, having taken off his loafers and pushed his feet beneath the sand.

            "It's a bit breezy," he says, pulling off his blazer and draping it over Tatianna's shoulders chivalrously. She smiles at him, reaching up to wipe at his chin again.

            "It's still there," she says with frustration.

            "Is it?"

            "Yeah. I'm so sorry, Ville."

He gently pulls her rubbing fingers away from his chin before pressing his lips upon hers. The sand makes for a comfortable bed as he sinks on top of her gradually. It must have been all of that sappy music or her perfume luring Ville in when he decides to forget all of his other responsibilities and stay on the beach, kissing Tatianna until they fall asleep.

 

            The sun wakes her up. Tatianna stares up at it, sitting up slowly. She can tell that it must be no earlier than around six in the morning. If Ville hadn't been lying there asleep facing her, she would have thought that last night was simply a dream. His face is angelic, the lips pouted, hand beneath his head with his cheek in a pale palm. She questions waking him while rubbing the sleeves of his velvety blazer that he had put on her hours prior. She sits there staring at him a while, a few people walking down the shore, staring at them as they pass by. Just when Tatianna decides that she should wake him, Ville's phone begins to ring somewhere in his trousers. After the second vibration, his eyes pop open. He looks around before sitting up straight, taking in his surroundings. He looks somewhat surprised to see Tatianna still there in her red dress, her hair tumbled over to the side with sand dusting it.

            "Good morning," she says. He smiles, pulling his phone out of his pocket. When he speaks, his deep voice is croaky with sleep.

            "Linde—I'm still out. I sort of…fell asleep…Don't worry, I'll be at the hotel soon. Bye."

He sighs, pushing his hands through his hair hastily, hating to look a mess in front of his date. He wipes the drool off his cheek.

            "Shit…did we…we fell asleep here?" he asks, shoving his feet back into his shoes. Tatianna only laughs in response.

            "I'm sorry. I don't know how the hell that happened. Tatia, I should go."

            "Okay," she says as Ville stands, offering his hands to pull her to her feet.

            "And it's _Tatianna_ , actually," she adds. Ville's eyes widen.

            "So, you just let me sleep with you without even knowing your name? I'm so sorry," he admits.

            "No, no, no," she laughs, "Actually…I thought it was cute, how you say it. And don't worry, nothing happened. We just kissed and went to sleep."

            "Oh, I know _that_ —thank God," Ville says, proud of himself for not drinking. His brows furrow and he looks apologetic as he grabs Tatianna's shoulders.

            "Oh—no—that's not what I meant at _all_ —I wouldn't have been upset if we slept together—I'm just glad I didn't drink—"

            "It's okay," she says firmly, pressing her hand against his chest just as well, "I know what you meant."

Ville relaxes.

            "I had a lovely time with you, Tatia—I mean _Tatianna_ —"

            "I like the way you were saying it. You can call me that."

Ville grins.

            "Tatia, I've got to get to the hotel and prepare for the show this afternoon."

            "I know."

She seems to be so understanding of him that he completely relaxes. Tatianna picks her shoes up off the beach.

            "Let's go back to my house and I'll call a cab," she says. Ville clasps her hand as she balances to put her shoes back on when they make it to the pavement. It doesn't take long before Ville finds himself at Tatianna's kitchen counter with a mug of hot coffee.

            "My, you can brew a good cup," he admits. She leans barefoot over the counter to rub at the lipstick that had smeared on his chin. He laughs quietly.

            "Sweetheart, it's not going away any time soon," he promises. Before they can kiss, a car blows its horn at the front door.

            "Shit! I should be at work," she says, finally dropping back to reality.

            "Then I'd better go," Ville says, standing. She leads him to the front door where he pauses to kiss her forehead sweetly a lingering moment.

            "I'll call you," he promises, realizing that tonight is his last show in Spain before flying home to Finland. As he hurries to the cab, he can't wait to see Tatianna again.

 

            "Is that lipstick?" Migé asks, pointing to Ville's chin. Ville hadn't bothered to go up to his room for a shower before joining the band for breakfast in the hotel. Migé laughs as Ville begins to blush.

            "So, you were with a lady all night, weren't you? Good for you, Ville. It's been a while."

            "Oh, be quiet. Nothing…happened," he explains, rolling his eyes.

Linde cocks a brow between bites of scrambled eggs.

            "Then where the hell did you get the lipstick from?" he asks. Ville closes his eyes and takes a long sip of coffee, knowing that he won't hear the end of this one.


	2. Chapter 2

  
            Helsinki's sun shines in Tatianna's eyes. Ville, walking in front of her, is continuously speaking of the city and his time spent here. He keeps saying that he can't believe it's finally over. He'd been touring the world for over a decade with H.I.M., and now that chapter of his life has come to an end. He remarks at the sense of bittersweet-ness in his heart. Tatianna finds the city interesting, despite being entirely unable to understand Finnish or any of the non-English dialects she's heard in her twenty-four hours in the country. Ville pulls open the door of a café and Tatianna walks inside. He orders two coffees and she waits at the table for him.

            "When are you returning to Spain?" he asks, mixing some sugar into his drink. She thanks him before pulling open the lid of her coffee to smell it.

            "Today is my day off, and I am actually supposed to be on holiday for the next two weeks. I just have to send in the final photos from our shoots by Friday. I was thinking…to maybe go to Sweden and surprise my old roommate."

Ville nods, once again spiraling headlong into her chocolate eyes. It's a solid minute before he realizes he's staring at her and glances elsewhere.

            "But now…I'm thinking I might stay here for the week. If you like. You can show me more of Finland," she says, hoping that he'd want her to stay.

            "I was hoping you'd say something like that. I wasn't sure if this date would be the last time I'd see you. We didn't really discuss that," Ville explains. He sips his coffee. Tatianna blushes.

            "I still have your blazer," she explains, resting her elbows on the table and getting lost in Ville's eyes. He laughs.

            "I completely forgot about that…Maybe I would have noticed with all the laundry I've got to do." He shrugs at the idea of getting through the mountains of clothing waiting at home on his basement floor and sighs.

            "I'm great at folding, if you need help."

Ville smiles. In a taxi on the way to Ville's, Tatianna can't stop kissing him, especially because it makes him smile. Several times, she presses her nose into his shoulder and inhales. It isn't cologne so much…it's Ville himself. The scent of his skin drives her into an erotic frenzy. She manages to control herself by pulling back every now and then, but the way that Ville draws her back in with both hands resting against her back makes it hard to stay away for long.

 

            She can't stop shaking considering the way that the washing machine rocks beneath her bottom. She digs her hands further into Ville's hair. He had sat her there hastily so that she wouldn't have to stand on the tip of her toes to reach his lips. She had sort of been joking about the laundry, but it didn't really seem to matter to Ville. Since their night on the beach in Spain, he had wanted time alone with her, with no responsibilities to consider. Since the last show the previous night, he realized he had no real plans for the rest of the week. Or the rest of his life, for that matter.

            Tatianna begins to laugh, falling forward against Ville. She pulls her head back, resting both hands atop the rocking machine. Ville grins, pulling her down off the machine. She runs a hand down his arm, starting back up the basement steps excitedly.

            "You haven't given me a proper tour of your beautiful home," she calls. Ville follows her hastily and leads her into his kitchen. He clears his throat and begins to open the shades and allow the sunlight in.

            "I used to have an apartment. And then this…tower sort of home," he explains, "And finally, I bought a real house. It's nice seeing my family when I'm home, but I also enjoy having a place where I can pretty much isolate myself," he explains, gazing out into an overgrown backyard, "Like Lapland. I used to write my music there in the wilderness." Ville ponders his time spent in isolation, in snow. He had never thought to bring anyone there—no—the purpose was to be alone to write. If he wasn't writing music anymore, maybe he would want to bring Tatianna there, if they were meant for each other…Ville flinches slightly when Tatianna wraps her arms around him from behind. He runs his hands over her fingers as she presses her head into the center of his back. The pair stand there quietly for a moment. Ville brings Tatianna's hands to his lips and kisses them.

            "I was engaged once," he says. Where her ear is pressed to Ville's back, she can feel his voice vibrate. She lifts her face off his back to listen.

            "It didn't end well. If there's one thing you should have come to know about me by now, it's that I'm a broken man. In many ways."

He turns around then, towering over her, holding both of Tatianna's wrists in his hands, as if to keep her from touching him.

            "I don't want you to be disappointed because I'm not jumping into anything with you."

            "You could never disappoint me, Ville," she says calmly, searching his expression which has hardened with thoughts of his past experiences with women.

            "Are you sure about that?" he asks. She opens her mouth to speak and finds herself at a loss for words.

            "Am I just…a curiosity to you, or do you really want more?" he asks, leaning down so that he's closer to her face.

            "I have to be honest with you: I'm not just looking for someone to fuck."

            "Of course not…is _that_ what you thought I intended?" she asks him somewhat disappointedly.

            "…I'm not sure," he admits. She sighs, pulling her wrists out of his grip and placing them in the back pockets of her jeans. She shrugs, eyes falling for the floor.

            "Do you want me to go, Ville?" she asks without making eye contact.

            "Of course not. I'm sorry…I'm just a little protective of myself. I wanted you to know exactly what my intentions are."

As she continues to look down, she feels his hand cup her cheek. She closes her eyes, leaning into his touch.

            "I used to be addicted to alcohol, but I'm still a love addict…I don't think that will ever change. There's no rehab for love."

She laughs quietly, gazing up at him.

            "Well, then tell me everything," she says, placing a hand on his waist. Ville pulls out a chair and sits at the kitchen table, Tatianna following suit. She listens to his deep voice embarking on the story of his love life, his first heartbreak, first girlfriend, losing his virginity, being engaged. Pretty soon, Tatianna finds herself trying to stay awake on the couch as Ville scrawls away frantically and strums a guitar with spontaneity and a voice that was more soothing than anything that she'd ever heard. He plays her songs he never bothered to share with his band, things that never made it to the albums. The sun begins to rise again when finally the heaviness of her lids give in…

 

            "Really, it's not the right time, Linde—I'm in the middle of something…" Tatianna stirs on Ville's couch where a blanket has been draped over her shoulders. As she rubs her eyes, she hears Ville sigh with impatience before he goes on in Finnish. Linde appears in the doorway holding the hand of a small girl. When Ville walks into the room, she releases his hand to run up to Ville and hug him.

            "Oh," Linde says unexpectedly, setting eyes on Tatianna. He grins knowingly, continuing to speak to Ville in Finnish. Tatianna quickly sees that the child is none other than Linde's daughter. Linde says something to the girl, pushing a hand through her blonde hair. She nods and he kisses her on the forehead. He addresses Ville again, who nods as Linde sees himself out. The front door closes and Ville leads the girl out of the room, speaking to her in a very friendly tone. She goes into the kitchen and Ville returns with a sigh.

            "I'm sorry to wake you, sweetheart. I would have, but when you fell asleep, I figured you might sleep better here than in a hotel. If you'll excuse me, Linde dropped his daughter off here for a while. He has to run some errands. I'm sort of an uncle," he explains, pulling open the curtain a ways to let some sun in. Tatianna laughs.

            "…What?" Ville asks unsurely.

            "That's just…that's adorable," she says. Ville blushes slightly, the same way Tatianna had noticed him blushing when Linde was speaking to him moments prior. She had a feeling he was talking about her, and little did she know, she had been right.

            "I guess I should get out of your hair then—"

            "Oh god—no. Please, I have no idea what to do with a pre-teen girl. You have to stay and help me," he adds. Tatianna can only laugh.

            "Okay." Tatianna sits up to stretch. When Ville approaches with a smile to hug her, she places her hands on his chest.

            "I smell. I need a toothbrush," she admits.

            "Well, I can't do much about the toothbrush—unless you'd like to use mine. But if you want a shower, I have more than one." She places her hand on his cheek. He kisses her forehead.

            "Why don't I just go back to my hotel and change, then come back—?"

            "Please, don't leave," he begs, gripping her waist. She realizes then that he doesn't want to be left alone with a "pre-teen." She laughs. He kisses her forehead again, begging.

            "Okay, Ville…you look really tired," she adds, cupping his chin. He grins wearily.

            "I didn't sleep. I couldn't. I was inspired by watching you sleep."

She glances past him at the desk where he'd been writing away between playing his guitar. He directs her up to the shower and tells her to pick out whatever she wants from his wardrobe. As Tatianna disappears up the stairs, she hears the voice of the girl once more. She sneaks around the corner to catch sight of Tatianna disappearing up the stairs. Ville begins to speak to her, and she wonders what he's saying. The heat of the shower wakes Tatianna up. Ville's home looks barely lived in, owing to the fact that it's new and he'd spent little time there between touring. In Ville's closet, Tatianna pulls out a clean black t-shirt. She manages to find a pair of sweatpants with a twist tie, and aside from them being too long, it's the best she can do.

            The bed looks as if it hasn't been slept in for ages, Tatianna notices, as she slips into Ville's sweatpants. By the time she makes it back down the stairs, she finds Ville playing chess with Linde's daughter. They chat idly in Finnish. When he sees Tatianna approaching, he pauses in moving his knight to introduce Tatianna to the girl. He translates between the two of them, and Tatianna makes herself comfortable watching them play. She ends up taking Ville's place as he excuses himself to make lunch. Despite being unable to really talk with Linde's daughter, they laugh and exchange smiles. Tatianna ends up losing for Ville, and they eat while he continues to translate for Tatianna. She had known a little about Linde's daughter from the interview she'd had with the band during their last tour. The young girl is breathtakingly beautiful and seemingly very well-mannered. Tatianna begins to wonder what Ville had been afraid of to be left alone with her.

            She finds him blushing when Linde's daughter points at her, the tone of her voice and facial expression allowing Tatianna to know that she's asking a question. He shakes his head and the girl continues to stare back and forth between the two of them. And then the girl, named Sofia, places both her hands on Ville's knee, almost pleadingly, her eyes continuing to flit back and forth between him and Tatianna. Tatianna looks on curiously, desperately wanting to know what they're talking about. Ville says something to her and kisses her on the forehead. And the doorbell rings. Before Tatianna can ask Ville what Sofia had said, he rushes to the door.

            Ville calls out to Sofia. She stands up, grabbing her jacket. She almost rushes out of the room, but stops in the doorway before turning back and hugging Tatianna. Tatianna is surprised, but in a pleasant way. Tatianna laughs, wrapping both arms around Sofia. Sofia smiles at her before making her way to the front door where her father is waiting. When the door is closed and locked, Ville sighs with what sounds like relief. When she becomes tired of waiting for him, Tatianna starts into the hall. She finds Ville leaning back against the door with closed eyes and a smile on his face.

            "Ville?"

He looks surprised to see her, and pulls up off the door.

            "Linde just picked her up. We're free again."

            "What was Sofia saying just now?"

Ville looks away, smiling shyly.

            "Nothing," he lies, waving a hand. Tatianna stares him down as he makes his way towards her, narrowing her eyes with a playful smile.

            "Alright, she wanted to know whether you're her new auntie," he admits with a small laugh. His cheeks are full of colour when he meets her gaze again.

            "I didn't think it'd be appropriate to tell you."

            "Awww, Ville, I think that's cute…wait, what did you tell Sofia?"

            "I told her…that you are a _very_ dear friend of Uncle Ville's."

            "She seemed like such a sweet little girl. And her resemblance to Linde is striking."

            "Ah, well," Ville sighs, closing the gap between them and wrapping his arms around her, "Yeah…" he says.

            "So, why were you afraid to be left alone with her?"

            "I wasn’t afraid. I just didn't want you to leave. And if Sofia tells Linde that I have a new girlfriend, he'll tell everyone that and they won't try to drop by unexpectedly and interrupt us," he explains. Tatianna cocks a brow.

            "Oh," she says, pulling her arms around Ville's neck, "Am I your girlfriend?"

She gasps when Ville picks her up off the floor.

            "Yeah…yeah, I think you are."

She blushes and laughs, smoothing hair out of his face.

            "And what did you mean by us being _interrupted_?" she asks seductively. Ville's heart skips a beat.

            "Well, we were having a nice time. I didn't want it to end so soon." He carries Tatianna into the kitchen and places her on the countertop.

            "You look terribly cute in my clothes," Ville says, eying her up and down.

            "I do?"

            "Yes. Very relaxed."

She holds his face in her hands for a while, just admiring him. He smiles gradually.

            "Will you come take a nap with me?" he asks. The exhaustion on his face is evident. Tatianna tilts her head to the side.

            "Just a nap, Tatia. I can barely keep my eyes open, and I used the last of my energy to carry you in here."

She strokes his head absently.

            "Please?" Ville pretty much begs.

            "I have to admit, I enjoyed our night on the beach. I like to hold someone when I sleep."

            "Okay," she says quietly, not that she'd have refused, but she still wants to change into her own clothes, not that she minded smelling like Ville. He pulls her by the waist off the counter top, leading her by the hand up to his room.

            "I'm sorry about that, though. Linde sometimes drops Sofia with me when he wants to go somewhere."

            "She doesn't have a mother?" Tatianna asks curiously. Ville pushes open the door of his bedroom.

            "Uhm, they're divorced. Sometimes Sofia's mother isn't around."

            "Well, it's so sweet of you to help him out," Tatianna says.

            "Of course. Sofia is like a daughter to me. I've known her since she was a baby girl."

Tatianna's heart flutters even faster as she and Ville lie face to face beneath the quilt. Ville wraps an arm heavily around Tatianna and she returns the embrace.

            "Isn't this nicer than sleeping alone?" Ville asks quietly. Tatianna nods, kissing his forehead. It isn't long before Ville falls asleep in front of her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been rather despondent about life more than usual lately. Sorry for late updates.

 

_No one will love you the way I do…_

            Tatianna awakens to something soft and heavy on her chest. It's breathing. She realizes it's not the poodle she had when she was sixteen upon brushing her hand over a soft, sleeping cheek. She realizes that she must have dozed off. Ville breathes deeply in his sleep. She wonders at what point he rolled on top of her.

            "Ville?" she says quietly. He's completely asleep. Her left breast grows numb beneath the weight of his head. She had begun to sweat on her inner thighs from the combination of Ville's heavy sweatpants, the quilt, and his body. Despite all of the heat, it feels nice. She runs her hand down his back soothingly, hoping he'll stir. He never moves an inch. Tatianna glances at the window. The sun is still visible through the slightly peeled curtain. She reasons that it can't be later than one in the afternoon.

            "Ville," she says a bit louder, rubbing his shoulders harder.

            "Mmmm…sweetheart," he grumbles, "…Yes, sweetheart," his familiar tired and groggy voice croaks. Tatianna grins from ear to ear.

            "Please, you're a better pillow," Ville mutters, turning his head to the other side and resting it lower against her stomach. Tatianna laughs.

            "I know, Ville, but I really need to get back to my hotel. If I'm going to stay longer, I need to make sure they know. Plus, I'd like to put on my own clothes," she adds, rubbing his hair gently. He sighs and grumbles reluctantly.

            "Ville, come on," she says, finally picking up his sweet, heated head. His eyes are open as little slits before he closes them again, giving a dreamy grin as Tatianna rolls from underneath him.

            "Please come back, alright?" he asks. She pauses, holding her hair back in one hand as not to tickle Ville's cheek as she leans down to kiss him. He sighs pleasantly.

            "I'll be back," she whispers, letting her hand leave him with a gentle caress on her way out of the room. She finds herself not wanting to go as she calls for a cab, waiting in Ville's doorway.

 

            She falls back on the made hotel bed with a sigh, pulling the collar of the t-shirt up to her nose and inhaling Ville. He's such a comfort that she can't wait to get back to him. But she calms herself by changing slowly after painstakingly picking something out. Tatianna reasons that Ville would have found her breathtaking in a potato sack if he thought that she looked cute in his own sweatpants. The thought makes her heart beat too fast. She calls her sister, explaining that she'll be spending at least part of her vacation in Finland. She doesn't bother to explain that it's because of a man. When she starts out for supper, her phone ringing in her bag causes her to pause outside of a restaurant she had wanted to try. When she pulls the device from her purse, she doesn't recognize the number. She nearly ignores it before realizing that it's probably Ville.

            "Hi," he says into her ear, and she can hear the smile on his beautiful face. Tatianna starts towards the sidewalk and pauses, leaning against a lamp post.

            "Hi," she says breathlessly, drinking in the sound of his deep voice.

            "Where'd you go? I was hoping you'd be back before it got so dark," Ville admits.

            "You were serious?" she asks, not really meaning to have said this out loud. She's still stunned that he seems to be as taken with her as she had become with him.

            " _Yes_ , of course I was. I know that I was half awake, but I rather enjoyed that nap…while it lasted," Ville admits. She doesn't see him blushing on the other line.

            "Tatia…what are you up to?"

            "Just looking for something to eat. I made further arrangements with my hotel so I can stay longer. I must have lost track of time. But I wanted you to rest."

            "I've rested, believe me…where are you right now?" he asks. Tatianna turns around to look at the sign on the restaurant she was about to go into.

            "Uhm…" she butchers the Finnish name so badly that Ville laughs genuinely. Tatianna is thankful that he cannot see her blushing.

            "Hang on. Get a cab to mine. I want to make you dinner. Besides, you promised me you'd be back."

Tatianna laughs.

            "Hmmm, I don't recall promising anything," she says sarcastically.

            "Aw, come on…please?"

            "I was only joking, Ville. I'd really like that. I'll be right there."

            "I'm waiting."

 

            She leans on the countertop, watching Ville move about the kitchen, aromas meeting her nostrils. He hasn't been able to stop singing fragments of the song he'd written as she slept on his couch the previous night.

            "Damn, _just_ when I decide to retire, you rush into my life and bring…all this inspiration. What am I gonna do with it?" he asks.

            "You can still write music, can't you?"

Ville sighs, sounding rather overwhelmed. He had shaved since she left, combed his hair back into a neat bun, clearly having spent as much time getting ready for Tatianna as Tatianna had spent getting ready for him. If she didn't know any better, she would have sworn the floors to look a little bit shinier than they had upon her first time in his home. Over something hot and flavorful, Tatianna talks to Ville about her career, her childhood. He seems to have moved a little bit closer on the other side of the counter, the longer they talked.

            In the middle of telling him about her first dog, Ville begins to stroke her hair idly, almost as if he doesn't even know he's doing it. This distracts Tatianna long enough that she stops talking entirely. Ville laughs lightly.

            "He ate what? Your boyfriend's car keys?"

            "Huh?"

            "Your dog," Ville says quietly. Tatianna waits for it, Ville's eyes ever brighter than they had been a moment ago. The kiss is tasteful, almost chaste. Tatianna tilts her head to the side, leaning her cheek into Ville's palm. She knew this was going to happen the second that he called her. Had Ville known it, too? She kisses him back, parting her lips, letting her hands wander to Ville's bun. She pulls the tie loose, reveling in the light, minty wind the movement of his brunette tresses send her way. The next thing she knows, Ville is literally pulling her over the wooden counter top. At some point, he must have shoved the dishes out of the way, because Tatianna doesn't hear anything shatter upon the floor.

            Ville's hands grip at her thighs. Tatianna pulls her dress up, pulling his hands against her skin. Ville doesn't stop, gravitating towards her neck and sucking there rather hard, enough that it causes her to moan loudly.

            "Come here—come here," he says desperately when Tatianna grips on the counter. He had begun to pull her off of it. It wasn't that she didn't want to be near him, she just couldn't stand the thought of falling.

            "It's driving me crazy," Ville admits, struggling with his belt buckle. Tatianna bites her lip a moment, wondering whether she should stop things from progressing. But as Ville fidgeted, she had this sensation between her thighs as if she would explode. She shushes him, grabbing his belt buckle and pulling it off with ease. He grips the counter top, watching with anticipation, panting. When his trousers fall, she can see just how excited he is.

            "Is this crazy, Tatia? I love you so much…that it…it actually hurts me," he explains with a somewhat uneasy voice.

            "Oh, Ville. You're making me fall for you." He takes her into both arms then. It was then that he got her. Every bit of her body and soul screams out to him. Not breaking eye contact, Tatianna starts unbuttoning Ville's shirt, kissing down his chest as the flesh appears before her eyes. She pulls Ville's briefs down, resting her lips on his shoulder and nibbling it. He moans. The sound pleases her.

            "Do it," she says, not even recognizing her own voice, given the enormity of the eros there. Tatianna gasps, covering her mouth with both hands when the sound of her underwear tearing meets her ears.

            "I'll buy you another pair," Ville says hastily before attacking her lips. She had barely felt him pull the item from under her ass. She laughs, placing her hands on Ville's shoulders. He smiles somewhat sheepishly. In Ville's defense, she had been wearing a delicately _thin_ pair of lacey underwear she usually wore once in a blue moon.

            "Will you take this off?" he asks hopefully, tugging at her dress. Tatianna uses his body as support while she stands to remove her black dress. It's the type of dress that doesn't require a bra, and Ville's eyes feast greedily upon her supple breasts once they're release from the fabric. He picks her up and carries her to his room without hesitation. Once there, all she wants is to feel him inside of her. Ville takes his time kissing her from the neck down, enjoying the way that his touch leaves Tatianna's back arching, hips rolling towards him. He bites incredibly gently, watching to see Tatianna's reaction where he pauses at her navel. She twists her fingers into his hair, moaning all the more. So he bites her a little bit harder, spraying her hips with kisses.

            She parts her legs in acquiescence with Ville's guiding hands. He tastes her with a moan that sends Tatianna to the stars and back. She begins to feel a burning sensation, wanting to break free of her skin, wanting more of Ville inside of her. He sucks on her and she shivers, grabbing at the soft hair on his head between her legs. She begins not to feel in control of her own body, writhing in ecstasy. Embarrassed by how loud she has become, she grasps a pillow from the top of the bed and muffles herself with it. She feels  a pause then. A long arm reaches up and grabs the pillow from her face, throwing it hastily aside.

            "Sing for me, sweetheart," Ville says breathlessly before continuing to lick roughly at her insides, swirling and twirling his tongue as far as it will reach. Tatianna gasps and she feels herself nearing a point of no return. Ville sucks at her fleshy clit, pulling it between his lips. She sits up a bit to watch, finding him leering up at her with a type of expectant and hopeful gaze. Her legs clench when her body begins to wrack with an orgasm. Ville holds the limbs firmly apart, moaning against her flesh as if to mimic her noises. He crawls up from below, his flat stomach colliding with Tatianna's when he enters her. The whole world feels as if it has dropped away from her body then. She sucks him in. Ville gasps. She gazes up at this almost pained expression on his face, but his moan tells her that all he feels is pleasure. He hadn't been inside a woman in far too long. He wanted to thank her, but deciding not to make the moment awkward, he continues threading his fingers into Tatianna's, needing contact with something else—any other part of her—if only to keep from losing himself just as quickly as he'd mounted her.

            Waves of chocolate are spread out beneath her head, the large almond eyes like the darkest coffee, keeping Ville wired and alert. She grins up at him without teeth. She rocks her hips up against him needily.

            "I—I'm sorry," Ville babbles breathlessly, "I don't want to fall apart just yet."

            "Hmm?" She sounds so dreamy, almost as if she's just waking from a deep sleep.

            "Just give me a moment," Ville pleads, trying hard not to focus too intensely on the deathlike grip of her cunt. Tatianna lifts her head slightly, cupping his cheek.

            "It's okay. I'm on the pill," she says quietly, giving him a chaste kiss with a closed mouth. He hadn't even thought of this; from the moment that Tatianna started to moan, all he wanted was to be inside her. She cups his shoulder blades, rubbing down his back. His body feels a lot more strapping than he looks.

            "You know, sweetheart, when a man jacks off too often, then he finally gets to be with such a perfect woman, he'll lose himself just like _that_." Tatianna grins, holding in a laugh. She kisses Ville again, bucking her hips up against him, just trying to get the motions going. A breath catches in Ville's throat. She tugs at his lower back, goading him to fuck back. The need overwhelms him then. He's rough at it, somewhat contradictory to all of the gentle caresses, hugs, and words he's given her in their short time spent together. He had already brought her to orgasm once, but Tatianna feels the sensation building up once again. This time, Ville joins her. She hadn't come here expecting this to happen, but for all of the warmth flooding her insides, she's glad it did.

            Ville only sinks further down her chest and rests his head there, pulling a hand down her thigh repeatedly, appreciatively. Despite this making it harder for her to breathe, she doesn't want to let him go. Ville licks his lips, exhaling her scent. She tasted better than anyone he'd ever had. It delights him that she lingers there, allowing him to bury her in his sweat and steam. Her fingers twirling into his hair and satisfied sighs are enough to make him smile.

            "I would hate it for you to spend more money staying in a hotel. Come here and stay with me."

            "Really, Ville?" she asks, lifting her head. Ville sits up, weaving his hands into her hair.

            "I don't want you to leave again," he admits. His expression seems to be begging in a way that almost makes Tatianna want to cry.

            "You don't have to sleep with me, if you didn't like it," he says.

            "What? You were great," she reassures him. Ville laughs.

            "No, I mean to sleep. Like, at night."

            "Why wouldn't I want to sleep with you?" she asks.

            "I don't know…you seemed to be in a hurry to go before, after Linde picked Sofia up."

For the first time since knowing him, Tatianna detects a bit of insecurity in Ville.

            "Was I too clingy?" he asks.

            "Of course not, Ville. What makes you think that?"

He shrugs, "I don't know…I don’t want to drive you away. You're the first woman I've really had since I was engaged more than ten years ago… " Tatianna likes the thought of Ville _having_ her, whatever that means.

            "I'm not going anywhere," she promises, pressing her forehead to Ville's. He grins shyly.

            "I just worried that maybe I'm coming on too strong."

            "Well, if you call what we did coming on too strong, I liked it." Tatianna's enticing tone threatens to make him hard again. Ville laughs genuinely, gripping her waist with both hands. They kiss there for some time, until it gets so late that Tatianna knows she won't make it back to her hotel for anything to wear. Ville appears very happy that she will spend the night. She even uses his toothbrush, and when he finds himself sitting up awake beside her after she'd fallen asleep to him telling stories, it begins to feel like she's really his. Admiring her, he thinks about what happened in the past, how women had hurt him. But there's something different about Tatianna. He can't quite place it. Words continue to flood Ville's brain, and he scrawls them all out in the notebook that he keeps by his bed for whenever inspiration would strike. Making love to Tatianna filled him with all the passion he'd felt while away in Lapland alone, writing for HIM.

            "I hope you won't hurt me," he says to her sleeping form, playing with the long dark hair. He'd been hurt before, emotionally, physically. He finds himself hoping things won't end up that way again. He was in love and he knew it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had no idea where I was going with this, but I think I do now.

  
           Tatianna awakens in Ville's bed with a note where he had been sleeping. She sits up to read it to herself out loud, "I'm sorry I ripped your panties last night. I promised I would get you new ones. I'll be back shortly. V." She laughs to herself, picking up the lacey article of clothing Ville had placed on his night stand. He'd even left her a mug of coffee. It's still steaming with the recency of his presence. She reaches for it. When she starts out of bed and down the stairs, the front door starts to open. Excited that Ville is back, Tatianna runs down to meet him. She hadn't bothered to put Ville's sweatpants on and makes her way down the stairs in one of his t-shirts, which is long enough to cover her just below the bottom.

            "You are too sweet—"

            "Huh?"

            "…You're…not…Ville…"

A tall man with striking eyes just like Ville's stands there surprised. Almost immediately, Tatianna can tell that he's probably related to Ville. Had she'd been somewhat visually impaired, she would have thought the man to be Ville himself; he has the same cheekbones, the same mouth, the same eyes, and towering height with a sort of waifish physique. A characteristically Valo-esque eyebrow skyrockets and his pouty lips turn up at the side. He says something in Finnish, going on and on, before realizing that Tatianna doesn't understand a word he's saying. He kisses his teeth, gazing skywards for a moment, searching for the words.

            "You…girlfriend?" he asks. His voice is the same depth that sends shivers down her spine when Ville speaks to her, though the accent is a little bit different than Ville's, more foreign and less British, as Ville tends to speak. He has taken two steps closer to her, either not noticing or not caring how uncomfortable she is as she clutches the mug unsurely. He flips a set of keys in his hands, the metal jangling, looking Tatianna up and down. He laughs quietly through his nose at which point Tatianna's cheeks burn red. He holds up a thick stack of what looks like months worth of mail in front of her face, continuing to say something in Finnish.

            "Uh…" The man laughs again, eying Tatianna's legs, wondering where Ville is. The door opens and Ville makes his way inside.

            "Jesse!" He exclaims upon finding his brother standing there in the atrium. Looking as if he's been caught with his hand in the cookie jar, Jesse spins around to face Ville. Ville's smile drops when he sees Tatianna step to the side, un-occluding herself from Jesse's stature. A lecherous "Ah" escapes Jesse's mouth and Tatianna retreats up the stairs after placing the mug on a small table where Ville drops a bouquet of yellow roses and small Victoria's Secret bag. Ville sighs with what Tatianna recognizes is irritation. Jesse prattles on in Finnish. She'd only learned so little Finnish in the past few weeks, yet the only words she understands that he says are "pretty" and "girl," at which point she blushes, slamming Ville's bedroom door shut. She felt embarrassed and didn't know what else to do.

            She laughs to herself shyly and face palms for a moment before quietly opening the door a crack. She can hear Ville speaking to his brother. His voice is impatient. She can picture Jesse telling him to relax and rolling his eyes as he shoves the mail into Ville's hands. There's silence for a while. Tatianna creeps out of the room and stops right before the top of the stairs.

            " _Anteeksi_ ," Jesse says defensively, before asking Ville about her.

            "Tatia," he says shortly. The brothers converse a while longer, and eventually, Ville laughs. Ville starts up the stairs, and Tatianna rushes back to the room before peeking through the door nervously. To her surprise, Ville is smiling. She backs up as he makes it into the room and shuts the door. He stands there leaning against the door, eying her up and down in his shirt. Tatianna scratches her head nervously before blabbering to Ville.

           "I heard the door open, I thought it was you, I thought he _was_ you—I swear nothing—"

Ville interrupts her, the amusement slowly having built up on his face, "Oh, my sweet darling, I _know_ you would never cheat on me. We only just started. Now, come and see if these fit." As he hands her the yellow roses, Ville takes a seat on his bed and opens the lingerie bag. Tatianna rushes to the window when she hears the front door close downstairs. Jesse walks to his car. She hadn't heard Ville get up, so it startles her when a ghost white hand reaches in front of her and pulls the curtain closed. He laughs.

            "Yes, Jesse is my baby brother. People _do_ tend to say that we look like each other..." Ville's arms wrap around Tatianna's waist. He starts stepping backwards with her in his grip.

           "I'm nine years older, and hopefully sexier, than him." Tatianna laughs, running her hand over Ville's arm. He sighs against her neck and starts to kiss it, running his hands down her thighs.

            "I was just... _so_ embarrassed. I'm basically naked under this shirt."

            "My brother wasn't harassing you, was he?" Ville asks in a more serious tone.

           "No!" Tatianna exclaims when Ville spins her to face him. He stops looking so grim.

           "Literally, we were only standing down there for about twenty seconds before you walked in the door." Ville nods, making a mental note to remind himself to tell Jesse not to bother his new girlfriend.

            "Well, I'm sorry. He was just dropping off my mail. He often collects it for me when I'm not around," Ville explains, pressing a hand to Tatianna's cheek and kissing her forehead.

            "I figured as much," Tatianna explains.

            "Mmmm, Tatia," Ville sighs. Everything just sounds so sexy when Ville says it. Tatianna shivers, wondering whether Ville had intended this response. In time, she would come to see how possessive Ville could be. His hands travel to her behind under the shirt. His eyebrows rise when the mounds of her bare ass are cupped in his hands, and he grins in a salacious manner.

            "You're not wearing any underwear," he says. She laughs.

            "I _told_ you I was naked under this shirt."

            "If you don't mind me saying, I wouldn't mind you coming naked to my door everyday when I get home. Now, will you try on these beautiful undergarments I got for you?" Tatianna nods. Ville pulls the shirt off over her head, keeping an arm around her so their skin continues to make contact. When he starts to hand her a bra, she shakes her head.

           "Ville, you didn't have to get that. You just promised you'd replace the underwear—"

            "Shhh, shhh. Will you just try them on, for me?" He practically begs and Tatianna turns her back to allow Ville to hook up the bra. She pulls a pair of underwear out of the pink bag, and when she goes to step into them, Ville grabs her hands.

           "Let me," he breathes, just wanting to touch her all over. Tatianna stands there in silence a few seconds. Ville gently tugs the underwear from her hands. He leans down, practically placing his lips on her ear. His breath is hot and tickles her inside when he speaks.

            "Turn around for me, baby," says Ville quietly. Her shoulders arch a bit in anticipation of his touch. She turns around and Ville makes his way to the floor on both knees. Tatianna grips his shoulder shyly for balance as she steps into the underwear. Ville pulls them up slowly, tantalizingly, dragging the moment out. His eyes follow her flesh up and up, and up, until he secures the fabric at her waist. The lace underwear hug Tatianna's butt, and slip just between the cheeks a bit. She would _never_ have worn something that annoying of her own volition, but the smile on Ville's face and his eyes flitting back and forth excitedly over her womanhood stirs a sense of satisfaction within her. Tatianna gazes into the full length mirror on the wall, Ville still kneeling in front of her, his hands locked around the back of her knees. She turns to the side a ways.

            "Wait…how did you know my bra size? And…underwear?" she asks, pushing a hand through her hair. Ville's lips on her navel surprise her. He starts kissing her legs as well, too busy to provide her with an answer. She figures he must have peeked at the tags on her clothing, which are sitting neatly folded on the bureau. She knows they had been scattered throughout the house on the way to the bedroom hours prior; Ville had picked them up before leaving to buy her new panties. Ville starts moaning and panting and Tatianna gazes down at him with some surprise, flustered. She hasn't even moved or anything, but he's already getting hard at her feet.

            And with a rough tug, Ville causes Tatianna to fall onto her back in his bed. He crawls atop her hastily, fumbling with the fly of his jeans and kicking his way out of his shoes.

            "Do you like them?" he asks breathlessly. She only laughs in response at how quick he is to turn on. Ville is inside of her before she can answer. She grasps at his shoulders, surprised at how quickly Ville had pulled the lacey panties off without ripping them.

            "Ahhh," she groans, squeezing her eyes tightly a moment. Ville hadn’t given her a chance to prepare herself for him. But she would have let him do anything to her. She clutches at his chest, gasping for air when he starts fucking her.

            "Are you comfortable, my baby?" he asks, pausing between rough thrusts. She can hardly speak with this going on, and only pulls Ville's head down for a kiss. He wanted to hear her screaming his name.

 

            Ville follows Tatianna like a puppy as she makes her way out of the hotel room carrying her purse and rolling a suitcase. Ville rolls the other one behind her and she finds herself not being able to wait to check out. He stands behind her, playing with her hair while she finishes at the front desk. They hail a taxi back to his place to drop off her things before heading out to a local show Ville had been wanting to see. She stays close by him for most of the show, until she has to use the restroom. Ville stays in the crowd, telling her he'll be up front when she gets back.

            In the bathroom, Tatianna can't help but notice a very pretty blonde woman who she swears had locked eyes with her a number of times during the show. The woman is standing at the sink, in front of the mirror, texting hastily. Tatianna hadn't bothered to ask Ville to move when the woman was staring at her because he seemed very taken with the music and she didn't want to disturb him. But after Ville kissed her and stood there with his arms wrapped around her, Tatianna swore that the blond woman was glaring at her. When Tatianna approaches the sinks to wash her hands, the woman is still texting excitedly, an agitated expression on her face. She looks at Tatianna, turning her head to get a good look at her. Tatianna looks away, lathering her hands and trying not to get too uncomfortable. She looks over at the woman again, anyway.

            "Mihin sinä katsot?" the woman spits. Tatianna doesn't understand everything that the blond says, but she knows from her tone that she'd meant to be rude.

            "Eres muy grosero," Tatianna mutters, shaking her hands dry and making her way out of the bathroom before the blond can insult her any further. Tatianna starts back to the crowd. She spots Ville at the side of the stage and smiles. The next thing she knows, there's a violent tug at her pony tail and she stops, falling backwards. She lands on the ground where the blond had pulled her down. She screams, but the music is too loud for anyone to really hear what is happening beside the stage. The woman hits her in the face and Tatianna sees stars momentarily. She shoves upwards into the face of the blonde, who's now insulting her in English.

            Tatianna slaps her and feels a violent turn when the woman gets her into a sort of headlock with her legs.

            "What the fuck did you call me?!" The woman screams, clearly not having understood Tatianna's Spanish. The woman ends up straddling her, strangling her. The ground shakes as someone runs towards the fight. Tatianna is stunned and shocked that this lady is losing her shit just because she told her she was rude. But there had to have been more to it; she was staring at her like Tatianna had done her wrong the whole time she saw her in the crowd.

            "I don't know you!" Tatianna chokes out. Another man comes running until two of them manage to pull the blond off of Tatianna. At this point, the singer onstage had noticed the fight and stopped singing to see what was going on. Ville turns to see what everyone else is looking at. When he sees Tatianna sitting up off the ground, coughing violently from having been choked, he makes his way over to her. The blond is kicking in the two men's arms, shouting obscenities at Tatianna. Not knowing what else to do, Tatianna begins to cry. Ville lifts her up under the arms and gets her to stand.

            "What the hell just—?" he stops talking abruptly when he looks at the woman who had attacked Tatianna. She had calmed down and kept trying to reassure the guys who pulled her off that she was cool. Tatianna looks at Ville's face to find that clearly, he knows this crazy bitch. He stands in front of Tatianna then, saying something angrily in Finnish. The woman returns fire and actually spits at him. The two men who had saved Tatianna intercept her and Ville to stop the blond from getting to him. Before she can ask what the heck is going on, Ville grabs her wrist tightly and pulls her away. They make it outside of the club where the show was going on. Tatianna stops and pulls her hand out of Ville's grip, still reeling from the attack.

            For the first time, he realizes how hard she's crying. Her eye is swelling up, bruises forming on her neck where she was strangled.

            "J-just give me a minute," she pleads, sitting on the curb, coughing and massaging her neck. Ville kneels in front of her with concern.

            "What happened?" he asks with wide eyes.

            "I don't know. She just _attacked_ me for no reason…I saw her when we were in the crowd, then I saw her in the bathroom. She said something nasty to me, so I said something nasty in Spanish. I came out and she followed me and pulled my hair, and punched me—" Ville's thumbs rubbing away her tears cause Tatianna to stop crying.

            "She was _glaring_ at me, Ville, like...I don't even know. But I think she knew you. Who was that?" Tatianna asks, finally calming down. Ville looks rather frustrated, and then nervous, and then scared. He looks behind Tatianna, as if to make sure that the crazy woman isn't coming. Tatianna gasps, turning to follow Ville's eyes. She stands abruptly, bracing herself. The woman is nowhere in sight.

            "It's okay—no one's there…Are you okay?" Ville asks, pulling her into his arms.

            " _No_ …no, I am not okay. This crazy bitch was trying to choke me to death. I don't understand. You looked at her like you knew her. Who is she? What were you saying to her?"

Ville sighs, his shoulders dropping, his soul deflating. He grips Tatianna's waist, and looks to be searching for the words to explain. He doesn't find them.

            "Let's go, okay?" He releases her to call for a cab without answering Tatianna's question. She wants to know who that woman was, but can tell from Ville's stature that he doesn't even want to think about it. He looks almost as shaken up as Tatianna feels. When he goes to put an arm around her shoulders, Tatianna backs up, placing her hands in front of herself defensively and shaking her head.

            "Tatia—"

            "I just need a minute," she says, keeping her distance, shaking her head. Ville sighs with what sounds like heartbreak.

            "She's not coming out, okay? I'm not going to let her touch you again. Okay…? Tatia."

            "Who was that?" Tatianna asks, tears threatening her eyes again. She had never been beaten up in her life and was scared shitless.

            "Just some crazy woman, okay?"

            "Just some _crazy_ woman? I think she knew you, Ville. I could see it on her face when she looked at you."

Ville shrugs and glances away momentarily, not wanting to continue on the subject.

            "Ville—"

His eyebrows pinch together angrily and Tatianna starts when his hand moves towards her face. She gasps and Ville dabs at her philtrum.

            " _Fuck_. Your nose is bleeding, baby," he says. He pulls out a small pack of tissues he'd been carrying when the weather turned cold and presses a tissue to Tatianna's nose. She winces and pulls back from him, holding the tissue to her nose and sitting on the curb. Ville sighs and knees in front of her again. She had started crying. She keeps her eyes closed. Something warm envelopes her back and she looks to find that Ville has taken his coat off and put it around her.

            "I'm sorry," he says quietly, looking a bit guilty of something. Tatianna is silent, refraining from asking him again who the woman was. For some reason, she can tell that Ville won't answer her question, anyway.

            "She's gone. Okay, my darling?" Ville holds her hands, kissing the backs of them, as if he can take away the ache in her neck and at her eye by doing so. The cab arrives and Ville pulls the door open for Tatianna, helping her up and inside chivalrously. She sits far enough to rest the side of her head on the window, pulling her hand away from Ville when he clasps it. He directs the cab driver where to go, sighing sadly every now and then, but not bothering to touch Tatianna, who he can tell is probably unhappy with him.

 

            At Ville's front door, Tatianna pauses. Ville had gone all the way inside before noticing that she hasn't followed him. She stares at the ground and then at Ville. He stands there quietly a moment before coming outside to coax her in.

            "Come in, sweetheart. Let me clean you up—"

            "I don't…I just need a minute," she says, turning away from him.

            "Tatia—"

            "Leave me alone…please," she says, stepping away. Ville stands there quietly. Tatianna won't turn to face him.

            "Alright, do you want me to take you to the emergency room—"

            "I said I needed a minute," she restates more harshly. Ville sighs. He walks up anyway and kisses her cheek from behind. She doesn't hear the door close when he leaves her out there. Ville pulls the landline off the hook to phone his brother. He doesn't get an answer but leaves an angry message asking Jesse who he's told about his new girlfriend. Though she had dyed her hair, Ville recognized his ex-fiancée from the moment he saw her. He wonders what could have possibly happened to make Jelenä attack Tatianna, and how Jelenä even found him to begin with. He walks back to the front door, relieved to find that Tatianna is sitting at his front steps, his coat still slumped over her shoulders. He knows he's going to have to tell her about Jelenä sooner or later, especially if she tries to attack Tatianna again.


	5. Chapter 5

            When the sun is almost completely set and Tatianna hasn't come inside, Ville decides it's time to talk to her. He had left the front door open and the interior of the house is much colder than he would have preferred it.

            "Tatia."

She stands without hesitation and enters Ville's home, shutting the door.

            "You didn't have to leave the door open," she says blandly. Ville follows her up the stairs, grabbing her arm when she won't stop walking.

            "Stop. Just talk to me, please?"

She pulls her arm away from Ville, sighing, and pulling his coat off her shoulders. He takes it and carelessly drops it on the stairs.

            "What were you thinking about all that time?" he asks.

            "Going back home."

            "What?" he asks with a bit of surprise. Tatianna starts up the stairs again. Ville rushes up in front of her at the top and grabs her shoulders.

            "Stop," she says, closing her eyes. Ville hates to see the bruises all over her neck and eye. His eyes well up, knowing this is mostly his fault.

            "It's not you, Ville—"

            "No, don't. No, no, no," he begs as she starts into his room.

            "You _can't_ break up with me," he says somewhat angrily. Tatianna pulls her suitcase from behind the curtain.

            "Don't," Ville pleads, standing in the doorway.

            "I don't feel safe here, Ville," she says, not meeting his eyes. He continues to block her path. Finally, he just pulls the suitcase out of Tatianna's grip. She stares up at him with wide eyes.

            "Tell me who the hell that woman was or you'll never see me again."

Pain sets into Ville's face, the nose wrinkling up, brows pinching, lips quivering. Tatianna softens her tone, shocked that Ville has begun to cry.

            "Hey," she says calmingly, rubbing his shoulder.

            "Hey…"

This is the most vulnerable she's ever seen him.

            "I…I just want you to tell me, Ville…I won't go if you tell me who she was and why she attacked me," Tatianna promises, hugging him. He trembles a moment with grief. The handle of Tatianna's suitcase lands against the hardwood floor with a loud _thwack_. Ville sighs.

            "This is all my fault. I'm _sorry_."

            "How?" Tatianna asks, leaning back from him. He composes himself, staring at the ceiling and trying to get a grip of himself. His eyes just keep streaming and streaming. Tatianna kisses his chin and he closes his eyes. She wipes his tears away, as he had done to her while she sat on the cold curb.

            "Just…let's sit down and have a talk, yeah?"

She cups Ville's hand and brings him to the bed.

            "I'm sure it wasn't your fault, Ville," she says gently, massaging his hand. He looks down at her quietly.

            "Was she an ex-girlfriend? That's what I'm assuming."

            "No…she was my fiancée," he sighs, wiping his eyes and finally speaking.

            "The one from when you were a teen?" Tatianna asks interestedly. Ville shakes his head.

            "No. She was most recent."

He hadn't told her much about Jelenä, just that they had been engaged at one point and it didn't work out.

            "She saw us together. That's when I noticed her. And she wouldn't stop glaring at me," Tatianna explains. Ville looks beyond sorry.

            "Shit," he says, closing his eyes and shaking his head.

            "Why was she so angry if she's your ex…oh my god, you're still together," Tatianna says, putting the pieces of the puzzle together. Or so she thought. Ville grabs her shoulders a bit too hard.

            " _No_ ," he says adamantly.

            "Then why—"

            "She was pregnant and I left her," he says, finally spilling. He looks away from Tatianna then, clearly not very proud of himself in admitting this.

            "…You have a kid?" Tatianna asks.

            "No," he says, turning to face her again, a lot calmer now, "God, _no_. But it doesn't change the fact that I was such a horrible man to her. She told me she was pregnant and asked me to quit my band…you have to understand—Tatia—I was just in a bad place personally. I wasn't really ready to be a father. I was still drinking, and drinking _a lot_. I _know_ that I wouldn't have been a good father if I stayed with her and had the kid. On top of that, HIM was _just_ really beginning to make it—I couldn't walk off and leave Linde, Migé, the guys hanging. I would still be selling vibrators in my dad's shop if I had stuck around. I never finished school. I wasn't working a normal job."

            "Oh, Ville." Tatianna only feels sorry for Ville at this point. He closes his eyes a long moment before starting to speak again.

            "I tried to explain this to Jelenä, but she…she just got _so_ angry with me. Unfortunately, she found out she was pregnant _right_ before a major tour for the band. There wasn't really time to work it out the way I would have wanted to." His stomach lurches with pain at the memory of Jelenä breaking a vase over his head. He can't bear to tell Tatianna every ugly detail, the way Jelenä had screamed in his ear till he nearly went deaf, kicked him while he curled up in a ball on the floor of his old apartment.

            "Anyway, I left her angry, I was…hurt. When I got home months later, she wasn't pregnant anymore…She _never_ even discussed it with me, just went and had an abortion, threw her engagement ring in my face, and I haven't seen her since." All Tatianna can do is hug him. They sit there in silence a long while, holding each other.

            "If I had seen her, I _never_ would have let you go alone. Why didn't you tell me a stranger was glaring at you?" Tatianna only blinks back tears. Ville's thumb grazes her cheek on the side of her face that isn't bruised, and he forces a smile.

            "Jelenä was a jealous bitch. Sometimes, she'd even get jealous of my fans and accuse me of _cheating_ , something I never did to her." He sighs, still not being able to find it in his heart to tell Tatianna about the violent things his ex had done to him. He had only been able to comfortably discuss this with his mother, who had urged him to go to the police at the time that he told her. But his confessions were only revealed months after the assault, his bruises had healed, and he didn't want to bother being put in the spotlight of the media that way, especially not in front of his baby brother. Ville had loved Jelenä so much that he never even had the guts to hit her back. Despite how fucked the relationship was, he couldn't bring himself to demonize her.

            "Are you still angry with me?"

            "I…I wasn't angry with _you_."

            "Are you going back to Spain, then?" he asks coldly, staring at the wall, not wanting to invite anymore pain.

            "I was just angry," Tatianna admits, "You're not the one who beat me up."

            "If you stay here, there's no _way_ she's getting near you ever again. I fucking promise that I won't let that happen. I don't care what she _thinks_ you called her, that's no excuse to beat up a complete stranger."

            "I trust you, Ville," Tatianna admits. If she didn't, she wouldn't have agreed to stay with him in his home instead of at a hotel. He clasps her hand, kissing it. When he looks at her, he looks like he might cry again.

            "Let me fix you," he says, taking her down to the kitchen where he uses a damp dishtowel to clean her cheek and press some ice to her wounds. Tatianna sits on the kitchen counter, watching Ville the entire time. Deep down, all Tatianna ever wanted was someone to take care of her and love her. Ville fits the mold like a glove and she smiles, even as her eye aches. She keeps telling him that this wasn't his fault, but he begs to differ, clearly beating himself up over it. Tatianna knows that the rest of her time in Finland will be just fine, so long as Ville is by her side.

            In bed at night, Ville's arms are secure around her. The heat of his bare chest at her back comforts her. He couldn't keep his hands off her, and bruises begin to form in places other than where Jelenä had beaten her. A smile stays stuck on Ville's exhausted face. He has been talking into Tatianna's ear for almost an hour, saying sweet nothings that make her blush, things that make her wet. The sweat has dried on her back between them, essences mingling like a type of wine that neither can drink enough of. When Ville realizes that Tatianna has fallen asleep, he decides to finally get up and quench his thirst with a glass of water. Slowly, he maneuvers his arm out from under Tatianna's body, kissing her on the ribcage before pulling the sheets up to her shoulder.

            Just as he's standing naked in his kitchen, downing a second glass of water, the phone rings. Ville rushes to it, not wanting Tatianna to wake up; she'd been through enough shit for one day.

            "Hei…"

Jesse grumbles in irritation on the other line.

            "Why'd you have to leave me such a bitchy message? All I did was bring your fucking mail to your house. It's not my fault you left a naked girl there."

Ville sighs impatiently, "That _naked girl_ is my girlfriend. And something bad happened to her, Jesse. Who did you tell about her? I really need to know."

            "What…? What do you mean 'something bad happened'?"

            " _Jesse_ —"

            "Fine! I told dad—that's _it_ —I swear. Now, what happened to her?"

            "Jelenä—I don't know _how_ she found us, but she did, and she beat Tatianna up. I had no idea until it was too late."

            "…I swear I didn't tell anyone else. I just talked about her to dad. All I did was say you had a lady over at your house. I doubt he literally called up your ex-fiancée and—"

            "No, I know he didn't. He would never do that," Ville sighs, calming down.

            "…Why would Jelenä even care? She's married and has a kid now. She realized you had more important things to do with your life so she found some other guy."

            "You're keeping tabs on my ex-fiancée…? Don't answer that—she attacked my girlfriend. I guess we just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time…I'm sorry, Jesse…"

            "Well, is your girl okay?"

            "Yes. Thank God. I'm just…angry that this happened. She's from Spain, you know. She's on vacation right now, but I'm hoping she'll decide to move here. I don't want something as annoying as my ex to drive this woman away."

            "You're in love?"

            "…Yes."

            "Just be careful, V. I don't want to see you get your heart broken—"

            "She won't do that to me," Ville interrupts. Jesse sighs, not wanting to see his brother fall to pieces over some woman again. He'd gone through it with his drinking and no one needed to relive that.

            "Ville, I just want you to be okay."

            "Hey, that's _my_ job. I'm older than _you_ ," he says, easing the moment. Jesse laughs.

            "Thanks for calling me back, though. I appreciate it."

            "Sure. If you want, I can show Tatianna some of my old Muay Thai moves. That way, if Jelenä ever sees her again, she'll be able to defend herself." Ville laughs in earnest.

            "I'll think about it. Good night, J."


	6. Chapter 6

            Ville is dead asleep when Tatianna tries to wake him. Eventually, he grumbles, begging for ten more minutes, clutching her stubbornly. She gives up and decides to get on her computer. Tatianna feels as if she's been in a dream (aside from the crazy ex-fiancée attack) with Ville ever since she moved in. She no longer wants her stay to be temporary. Maybe she could find work as a photographer and editor in Finland. She opens her laptop case to use it in bed, smiling at the sensation of Ville's breath hitting her bare thigh.

            When Tatianna realizes that she can't get internet access like she had been able to at the hotel, she sighs. Ville opens one greenish hazel eye and looks up at Tatianna.

            "What you tryna do, love?" he grumbles, cupping her knee.

            "I need internet," she says quietly, not having meant to disturb him.

            "Use mine. It's on the bureau," Ville sighs, "Password is my middle name," he grumbles, continuing to doze off. Tatianna laughs quietly, kissing him on the cheek before getting up to use his computer. She turns it on, leaving it on the dresser before opening up her suitcase to grab a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt. Quietly, she leaves the room to go downstairs and sit at the island counter in the kitchen, making a mental note to remind Ville to change his password. She laughs to herself again.

            Tatianna stumbles upon various magazines, one of which catches her eye considering her background in photography. She realizes there's a lot more she'll have to probably understand if she wants to seriously apply for a job in this foreign place. She had been trying to teach herself Finnish using YouTube and various other sources online ever since she'd met HIM. She decides that when Ville wakes up, she'll persuade him to teach her. Realising that she has to translate an application that she happens upon, she decides to stop searching for the time being. She changes the water in the vase for the yellow roses Ville had bought her. She makes another mental note to thank Ville for them when he's up.

            After helping herself to something to eat in the kitchen, Tatianna makes her way about Ville's house. It's large and looks to be fairly new, the same as it had appeared when she first set foot there. She happens upon a bathroom she hasn't been in yet, and when she sees the marble tub she can't wait for a bath. Tatianna decides to pamper herself while Ville sleeps, clipping and filing all of her nails before soaking in a hot bath. She hears footsteps beyond the door, Ville finally making his way out of bed. They had stayed up particularly late, talking and touching each other until they were too tired to keep on. She doesn't blame him for sleeping so long; he liked to be in control in bed and had probably exhausted himself much more than she had.

            She pauses, letting the steam waft through the door before her. Ville is singing in his kitchen. Though she doesn’t understand what he's saying, she knows the song is about love. She sneaks upstairs to get dressed. Ville knocks on the door before she can slip into her jeans. She pulls it open to find him looking relieved.

            "I thought you'd gone out," he says.

            "I was in the tub."

            "Ah, that one. I've only used it once since I moved here. I hope you enjoyed yourself," he says, placing a hand on her hip. She stands up to kiss him.

            "Well, I thought you might be hungry. I'm sorry I slept so long."

            "It's okay. I had toast," she says, walking back into the room and pulling more clothes out of her suitcase.

            "That's _hardly_ a breakfast, Tatia," he says with a deep laugh.

            "You know, I have spare rooms. Why don't you take some of your clothes and put them in a closet?"

            "Now that I think of it, I _do_ have some laundry to do," she says, realizing that many of her things have already been worn, and she hadn't packed as much as she would have if she'd known she was going to stay in Finland longer. Ville clasps her from behind.

            "You can help me decorate. Maybe get some new sheets and things for the other rooms," he says, kissing deeply into her neck. Tatianna sways on her feet, eyes rolling closed. Ville's touch always makes it difficult to concentrate on anything else she's doing. She leans back into him, sighing. Her flesh is still hot from the bath and Ville can't help but put run his fingers over it.

            "Hmmm?"

            "Yeah," she whispers.

            "I saw that you were looking at job opportunities here. Why?" Ville asks. Tatianna turns to face him.

            "I…I kind of really want to stay longer," she admits, "I don't want to leave. It's not like I have a boyfriend at home." She shrugs. Ville pulls his hands through her wet hair.

            "I can't lie. It makes me very happy that you would want that. I know from personal experience that long distance relationships are hard. I'd be lying if I said that I don't want to see you go."

Tatianna smiles, her heart throbbing as Ville cups her cheek, leaning in to kiss her forehead for a long moment. She sighs, placing her head against his chest. They stand there, embracing one another.

            "You smell really… _really_ good," Ville admits, kissing the top of Tatianna's head.

            "Please don't laugh if I say this wrong," she says quietly, hoping Ville won't hear her.

            "What, sweetheart?"

            "Minä sinua rakastan."

Tatianna feels Ville stop breathing. She pulls her head back to find him smiling from ear to ear.

            "So, I said it correctly?" she asks. Ville revels in the thickness of her accent, even when she attempts to speak his language.

            "I love you," he says unwaveringly. Her nervous smile gets the better of her and she avoids Ville's gaze. He cups her chin so she's forced to look at him. She'd played around on the computer long enough to learn a few phrases and thought it would be cute to surprise him. What she's feeling for Ville isn't a lie, anyway. A glimmer of lust appears in Ville's eyes and he pulls Tatianna up against him for a deep kiss. She finds herself gripping his shoulders, her toes leaving the floor.

            "Rakas," Ville says hungrily. He calls her something else that she doesn't understand, but it doesn't matter for she knows in her heart what he means. He places Tatianna on the foot of the bed, kneeling there and gripping at the waist of her panties. She sighs, letting herself fall back with anticipation. Ville continues talking to her with those foreign words, the r's rolling similar to the way they do in her own language. Once he gets her underwear free, he pulls at her wrists, telling her something hastily. She sits up and he pulls her closer to the bed's edge, pulling Tatianna's legs over his shoulders.

            Heat rises in her chest as Ville keeps his gaze locked on her eyes, kissing her inner thigh until he presses his mouth to her most intimate parts. He closes his eyes in bliss with a moan. Already, Tatianna finds herself panting, grasping at Ville's hair. She'd never been fucked so many times in the course of a day. Ville grazes her harder with his tongue when she's not making enough noise for his liking. He pulls the cheeks of her rear into his hands and she gasps when he picks her lower body up off the bed, burying his face deeper between her thighs. The heat from his mouth at her maw becomes like a wildfire there and Tatianna squeals uncontrollably, her high pitched yelp music to Ville's ears.

            He doesn't stop until she's yelling at him to fuck her. Ville places Tatianna back on the bed before pulling his shirt off and hurrying out of his pants. His excitement is already visible before he even takes his briefs off. He instructs her in Finnish again, pushing her further up the bed until she can rest at the headboard. He pulls her leg aside, nearing her neck to bite and suck there. Tatianna rolls her hips forward with anticipation. Instead of his cock, she feels his hand between her legs. She has a feeling that her desperation for him delights Ville.

            Tatianna pants uncontrollably, holding around Ville's neck and breathlessly begging him to fuck her. He nips her earlobe, breathing dirty things into her ear, telling her how hard he's going to fuck her. She begs him, gripping the back of his neck and pressing her forehead to his. His fingers lift inside her and she gasps at the swiftness with which he fondles her. She throws her head back against the headboard, swearing and trembling at how close she is to orgasm.

            "Kultaseni," Ville breathes, grinning against the underside of Tatianna's chin. Her hips begin to undulate rapidly and his fingers never quit, the thumb relentless at her clit. A breath catches in Tatianna's throat and she comes. Ville grins with satisfaction, feeling the walls of Tatianna's cunt squeeze all around his digits.

            "Good girl," he says, kissing her cheek before bathing her neck in more kisses, pulling her down to rest on her back. She quakes in a full body orgasm, unable to tell up from down, open her eyes, or realize Ville's lips at her stomach now. When she comes out of the delirium, her calf is in Ville's hands and he's kissing her left shin hungrily. He mounts her again and finds his way inside her. She lifts her head up, gasping at the sensation, gripping his shoulders, still trying to catch her breath.

            "My god, Ville," she breathes. His moaning gets her excited again, enough that she can tell another orgasm is on its way. He pulls her up into lotus to let her thrust against him at her own pace. They climax together in each other's arms. Her body now covered in sweat, Ville's seed filling her hotly deep inside, Tatianna realizes how pointless her bath had been. And yet, she doesn't even care.

            "My sweet baby," Ville sighs, his head collapsing on her shoulder.

 

            In an Ikea in Helsinki, Ville throws the lilac comforter Tatianna was admiring into the carriage after she spent too long telling him she likes it, but it's too pricey.

            "Ville—"

            "Sweetheart, if you like it, it's yours. You need blankets for your room," he adds, kissing her temple. She grips the front of his shirt, kissing him back.

            "How's your eye today?" he asks, unable to erase the sense of guilt he feels when he sees her bruises.

            "Much better. That ice helped," she explains, kissing him again. On the taxi ride out, Ville had been talking to her in Finnish, until she could get the gist of what he was saying. He explained how to talk about the weather, oneself, general conversation. By the time the cart is too full to add anything else, Ville has explained furniture in Finnish to Tatianna. She had begged him to teach her curse words, and he declined, admitting that he hates to hear a woman swear. But to reciprocate, he had her teach him some Spanish.

            For the first time in a few hours, she realizes how hungry she is. She had been so high on all the kisses that she wasn't able to pay mind to her body's basic needs. She and Ville go out to eat, and back to his house where he starts setting up the things they'd bought in her room. She washes her clothes in the basement, feeling about as at home as she does back in Spain. It's almost as if she and Ville are kindred souls, that this was meant to happen. Ville is the sweetest man she's ever been with, not so overly macho like any of her past boyfriends. Tatianna had never been with a man like Ville. He wasn't afraid to be emotional with her, and vulnerable at times. She had never seen any of her past boyfriends cry—not once—and the ones she dated a long time only told her they loved her once or twice, and never uttered the words again.

            With Ville, it's like he has to let her know every twenty minutes exactly how he's feeling about her, with tender words, an embrace, a kiss, a touch, simply getting nearer to her. She hasn't felt this kind of unrelenting passion in a relationship before. In the kitchen while cooking dinner together, Ville continues to teach Tatianna Finnish, laughing and telling her how cute she is when she gets things wrong. She can't stop blushing around him, hoping this effect will never abate. He has his r's down pat by the time they're eating. She had no idea he could sound any sexier than his deep voice already does.

            "Will you show me your dad's shop?" For a while, she'd been meaning to ask Ville. He rolls his eyes with a smile.

            "Why? Are you not enjoying the sex we've been having? Why would you need to go to a sex shop?" Honestly, he has never taken a girlfriend there and doesn't see the point in doing so. He liked for girlfriends to be satisfied enough with him not to look for anything extra. Tatianna laughs.

            "I am just curious," she says, taking a bite of half the apple Ville had cut for the two of them. He thinks about it while chewing his half.

            "Well, if you want to meet my father. Jesse…well, he already told dad about you."

Tatianna cocks a brow, blushing a bit.

            "But don't worry—I know that he didn't have much to say, aside from the fact that you were half naked when you met."

Tatianna sighs, covering her eyes. Ville pulls her wrist down.

            "With that beautiful body, sweetheart, you shouldn't be ashamed."

            "I'm not ashamed. I'm embarrassed. Now I don't want to go. If I'm going to meet your dad, I'd rather do so in a more…appropriate atmosphere."

            "Oh, no. I'm not letting you back out now," he says, laughing somewhat diabolically. Little does Tatianna know, Ville would be thrilled for his parents to meet her. Despite how little time has passed since they've been dating, he loves her enough to want that.

            "Really?" She asks, "I thought you didn't want people knowing about us, you know, so we aren't interrupted here." Ville blushes.

            "I didn't really mean it like that, Tatia. I just…" he sighs, "there are _some_ people I would rather not know I'm in a relationship."

Tatianna thinks about Ville's ex and places her hand around her neck, remembering with discomfort being strangled nearly to unconsciousness.

            "Oh, sweetheart," he says, standing up off his stool and wrapping Tatianna in his arms.

            "It's all my fault," he says, and he just keeps saying it.

            "No," Tatianna says firmly, pulling back and cupping his face in her hands, "It is not your fault. That woman…is crazy. All I know is, I'm glad she never put her hands on you." Tatianna smiles. Ville swallows hard. He still hasn't found the strength to tell Tatianna what Jelenä had done to him in their relationship. He'd experienced _far_ worse than Tatianna's brief encounter, not that it makes him feel any easier about what Jelenä did to Tatianna. Tatianna never even did anything to Jelenä. She didn't deserve that abuse. He holds back tears over Tatianna's shoulder when she hugs him tightly. For years, he's been fighting with wondering whether he _did_ deserve some of Jelenä's abuse, after the way he reacted when he found out she was pregnant. Maybe if he had given her a real chance, she would never have hurt him. _No_. He may have been an alcoholic at the time, but he had never abused that woman in any way. Even still, trying to convince himself that he'd done no wrong to Jelenä is sometimes difficult.

            Tatianna convinces Ville to forget about going to the sex shop. He realizes how serious she is about wanting to meet his father under supposedly more appropriate circumstances.

            "And when I meet your brother again, I'm _not_ gonna be naked," she affirms.

Ville cocks a wry brow, "How d'you know? He might just decide to pop in while we're making love on my sofa." She shakes her head, fighting a smile.

            "Stop it," she says half seriously.

            "Why? I can't," Ville admits, pulling her off her stool and standing again.

            "'Cause that's not how I want people who love you to see me."

            "Why not? They'd definitely be able to tell how much I love you."

She narrows her eyes at him, feigning anger. Ville kisses her neck.

            "Just kidding. You're all mine. Every single part. Only for my eyes, kulta."

She sighs as he continues kissing her neck, kissing the bruises gently.

            "What does that mean?" she asks, her eyes closed in ecstasy.

            "I called you baby."

She laughs, the gentleness of Ville's lips beginning to tickle her. And it stops suddenly. After he's quiet for far too long, Tatianna looks at Ville. He's staring at the bruises on her.

            "I won't be able to stop feeling guilty until those go away."

            "Ville, how many times do I have to tell you? It wasn't your fault, baby."

He sighs and she perches back upon her stool, holding his head to her chest and kissing him.

 

            By the start of the next week, Tatianna has earned herself a part-time job at a magazine called POP. As part of her orientation, she is to undergo training, during which time she'll spend as a sort of apprentice to an editor and photographer. When the time comes for her to take some photos, she isn't thrilled to learn who she will be writing an article about.

            "Are you _sure_ that's what your manager said?" Ville asks, eyes still wide with disbelief where he sits Indian style in front of her on the couch.

            "Yes," she says for the third time. She sighs, leaning over to find her bag on the floor. She pulls out the information her manager had provided her with. Ville takes the folder hastily, shaking his head while reading it.

            " _Fuck_ ," he says just below his breath, "No, no, no…no, no, no, no, no," he says, looking at the one headshot Tatianna's manager had given to her.

            "That's her, right?" she says. Ville throws the photo back in the folder and drops the item on the floor dissatisfied.

            "Alright, you've gotta get a different job at a different magazine. I don't want Jelenä anywhere near you. When I last saw her, that's when I _meant_ to see her last."

            "What do you mean, Ville? You won't be dealing with her. It'll just be me."

His brows clench angrily.

            "Did you hear what I said, Tatianna? I said no. Quit and we'll figure something else out."

Ville bites his thumb nervously, eyes darting back and forth as he racks his brain trying to think of anything else Tatianna might be able to do for work.

            "It's is a _big_ magazine, Ville. I don't think I want to pass up on this offer."

            "I told you _no_ , alright," he says firmly, sitting up straight and cupping Tatianna's wrists.

            "I'd rather you work in my dad's dick shop than have to deal with my ex again."

            "…But I already resigned from my other job."

            "That's okay. You don't need a job. You have everything you need right here with me," Ville explains, pushing his hands comfortingly through Tatianna's hair. She can't help but smile a little bit. She didn't realize just how protective Ville could be. She sighs.

            "But…I really like this magazine—more than the one I worked for back at home. The pay is higher than it was for my old job."

            "I won't bury you, Tatianna. You're _not_ going to work there."

Tatianna's heart stops a moment. Ville's _so_ afraid of this woman that he thinks she's capable of murder?

            "Don't you think that's a bit extreme? It's not like I'll be _completely_ alone with her. My  manager will probably watch me, and there'll be makeup artists hanging about."

            "I don't care," Ville says stubbornly.

            "Just quit."

            "I don't want to work with Jelenä at all, but she's doing this huge contest or pageant of some kind, that's what I'm covering, and if I can impress my manager, I'll officially get the job—"

            "I'm not okay with this," Ville says, seriously, leaning an elbow on the couch, absentmindedly playing with Tatianna's fingers.

            "If she comes at me again, I _will_ be prepared, and—"

            "You're shorter than her, and she's an athlete now. You shouldn't underestimate her."

He shudders internally, remembering what it felt like when Jelenä punched him in the face. He could barely see out of his right eye for days. Tatianna sighs, tilting her head to the side. She crawls into Ville's lap and starts kissing his cheeks and forehead. He fights a smile.

            "No…I'm _mad_ at you," he says.

            "No, you're not, mi amor. If you just let me do this, I bet I'll never even see her again," she explains between kisses. Eventually, he smiles, meeting her eyes.

            "I'll be okay. I promise. I'm still standing, aren't I? She'll never keep me down."

Ville sighs, pondering it once again.

            "Fine."

            "Thank you," she says, kissing him.

            "But I don't like it," he admits.

She hates the idea of doing something that Ville doesn't want her to do, but she knows she'll be sorer if she stays at the house all day, fucking him until she can't walk straight.

 

            The day goes on somewhat boringly, until Tatianna finds herself face to face with Jelenä once more. Jelenä's smile drops automatically when she remembers under what circumstances she'd met Tatianna before. She hides her disgust well, shaking Tatianna's hand. Though she feels frightened, Tatianna doesn't show it. She listens intently while Jelenä speaks during their interview, making sure her recorder is on. They take a lunch break before the photo shoot, and as soon as the camera is not rolling, Jelenä continues to show disgust on her face around Tatianna.

            Tatianna begins to wonder who the fuck Jelenä thought she was. If Tatianna didn't know any better, she would have said that Jelenä had tried to trap Ville in the past by getting pregnant. If she was half as good a girlfriend as she thought she was to him, she'd have realized that Ville was having his own problems, and that bringing a child into an unstable relationship would have been a bad idea. It's not like Ville used to beat her. Unless there was something Ville wasn't telling her.

            He surprises her when she walks out of the building to go and find something to eat.

            "Ville? What are you doing here?" she asks.

            "Oh, is _that_ how you greet your boyfriend?" he jokes. She stands tall to kiss him.

            "I just thought I'd surprise you with lunch," he explains. She finally notices the bags he's holding. She'd forgotten that she relayed her entire schedule for that day to Ville, in the hopes that he'd try to stop worrying so much. She knows he's really checking on her, scanning her from the neck up, and with relief, _not_ finding Jelenä's handprint on Tatianna's cheek.

            "Is it just me, or do you look extra beautiful today?"

            "I know why you're really here," she says slyly, "I told you I'd be okay. And I am."

            "You looked scared to death when I saw you walking out of the lobby," Ville says, stating a fact. Tatianna sighs.

            "It's okay…I haven't been completely alone with her."

            "Good. Keep it that way."

Tatianna clutches Ville's hand and leads him into the building. They take the elevator up to the floor she works on and she leads him to her cubicle. He doesn't say much during their lunch, not knowing whether he wants to tell her more about his relationship with his ex.

            "Are you okay?" Tatianna asks, rolling her chair closer to Ville.

            "No, actually, I'm not. I'm not comfortable with you interacting with my ex in any way, shape, or form."

Tatianna sighs, hating it when Ville is unhappy. She clutches his hand.

            "Just…I don't know what else to tell you. But…if I would be honest, it kind of pissed me off when you kept telling me to quit. I mean, you weren't asking me, Ville, you were _telling_ me—"

            "Because I know what kind of damage Jelenä can do. Am I bad person for not wanting my girlfriend around her?" he snaps. Tatianna backs up a moment, turning back to her table. Ville could be possessive, but in a way that she can tell still comes from a good place.

            "You can't just tell me what to do. Like I'm a child. I may be younger than you, but—"

            " _I'm sorry_ ," he stresses, meaning it. In earnest, he was used to women doing as he said and taking the reins in the relationship. Jelenä had been the first to physically fight him over any issue in which he wanted things to go a certain way.

            "Baby, I am. But I'd be lying if I said your decision to do this doesn't make me unhappy."

            "I understand that. But it's just this _one_ time—then neither of us have to worry about Jelenä ever again."

Tatianna rolls her chair back over to Ville. He smiles. They kiss and make up. Tatianna leads him back out to the elevators to say goodbye. They stand there kissing until one opens with a _ding_. When Ville looks up, Jelenä starts out of the elevator. She pauses, and her expression becomes one of displeasure.

            "Why is your boyfriend here? Huh? We have work to do," she says, looking straight past Ville and at Tatianna.

            "I'm still on my break for another five minutes."

            "I don't care. I have somewhere to be. If you wouldn't mind, let's just get this photos taken and I can leave."

            "I know she's only an apprentice for now, but don't talk to her like that. You're much more rude than I remember," Ville says, standing somewhat in front of Tatianna. Jelenä scoffs.

            "Do not ever speak to me. If I take just one letter out of your name, I can spell _exactly_ what you are— _vile_ ," Jelenä spits. Ville narrows his eyes, but laughs it off, casually pushing a hand through his hair.

            "Don't you talk to him like that," Tatianna says defensively, feeling anger boil up inside her. Jelenä looks Tatianna up and down like she's a joke, and insults her in Finnish.

            "Hey," Ville says, just beginning to lose his cool. He addresses Jelenä in Finnish. He points to Tatianna, placing a hand over his heart. She keeps looking back and forth between Ville's ex and Ville. The woman crosses her arms and continues giving Tatianna glares.

            " _Lopeta tuo_." he says forcefully, standing to his full height. Jelenä scoffs, turning away for a moment, crossing her arms even harder.

            "Just make sure you are on time for this photo shoot. Otherwise, I will have to complain to your manager for fucking with my time," she says to Tatianna, looking her directly in the eyes.

            "What was that, Ville?" she asks. He sighs deeply, watching Jelenä walk away.

            "What did you say to her?" Tatianna asks somewhat impatiently, having grown frustrated in being kept out of the conversation. She'd caught that Ville told Jelenä to stop, but she didn't understand every word. She stares up at him waiting for an answer. Ville's eyes are closed and he's pinching his sinus as if he has a headache.

            "Don't worry about it, baby—"

            " _I want to know_ ," Tatianna demands, standing directly in front of him. Ville smiles almost slyly.

            "Then learn your Finnish and maybe you won't have to have me deal with the women who are clearly jealous of you."

Caught off guard, Tatianna blushes madly. Ville cups her chin.

            "It doesn't matter what she says. She's lucky you aren't pressing charges on her."

Tatianna nods.

            "And if she bothers you again, just let me know and I'll come right back here."

She can't help wondering why Ville won't just tell her exactly what Jelenä was saying. It's like he wants to keep something from her. For a moment, Tatianna stands back from Ville warily, pulling his hand from her chin. He frowns.

            "Come on," he says, getting closer. Tatianna moves his hand away from her cheek. He rolls his eyes.

            "She was just…she was just saying some really nasty things about you. Why do you want to know so bad—?"

            "Because I have a right to."

            "Insult her in Spanish until she sees red. She's not gonna bother you again."

            "How do you know that?"

            " _Why_ are you so mad at me?" Ville asks defensively, frustrated when Tatianna moves his hands away from her hips once again. She sighs, shaking her head.

            " _Please_ , just try to keep your distance from her. I'd rather not have to involve the police and have this woman blow my life away _again_. I feel badly enough as it is leaving you while that bitch runs about."

At this, Tatianna's heart skips a beat. She places a hand on Ville's chest, and moves it away almost as soon as she'd put it there. He smiles without teeth.

            "I'll be fine. I'll see you later. Thanks for lunch," she says, stepping on her toes to kiss Ville's cheek. His hand slides longingly down her back as she walks away and his desirous sigh is left breezing on her ears.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took my MCAT yesterday, the new one. I took the old one back in December 2014. I wasn't satisfied with my score. Fingers crossed for me that this time around I'll be really happy with what I get. I'm doing whatever the fuck I want to this weekend. No more 7-hour study periods for a while...

            "How was work?" Ville asks when Tatianna makes her way towards him on his lawn where he's raking leaves. Tatianna sighs, dropping her bag on the ground and jumping into his arms. He laughs, holding her tightly. She's quiet and he begins to worry.

            "What's wrong, kulta?"

            "I just…don't like being glared at all the time, like I did something wrong," she says.

Ville puts her down to face her.

            "And…well, my manager said I will be working to cover Jelenä's story throughout her competition. So unfortunately, I have not seen the last of her." Ville sighs and mutters something in Finnish.

            "What are you saying?" she asks.

            "If I tell you, you'll just get angry," he says.

            "What?" she releases him. Ville sighs, reaching into his back pocket to pull out his phone. He holds it in front of Tatianna's face. She takes the phone from him and scrolls down the page of an article on the internet. There are photos of her and Ville kissing in front of a taxi outside of Ikea. As she reads the article, her heart starts racing. There's a photo of her from just a couple of days ago, hailing a cab outside of the magazine's headquarters. She never even knew that someone was taking her picture.

            "I don't want to rain on your parade or downplay your skills, but I think _this_ is the reason why the magazine hired you. They must have seen this and realized that you worked with me and the band before. Now they have something to rave about—make themselves more attractive. The fact that you're covering my ex only makes it worse." Tatianna sighs, handing the phone back to Ville.

            " _Now_ do you want to keep this job?" he asks.

The thought of someone following her and Ville just for the tabloids makes Tatianna shudder, but she decides to hold her ground.

            "Yes. I'm not going to let this scare me away. I'm stronger than you think," she says. He sighs with discontent as she puts her foot down.

            "Ville, come _on_. If they want me to cover your ex, I'm sure it will only be a one-time thing."

            "Neither of us _know_ that," he says, cocking a brow, "I told you that I don't like this."

            "How did you even find out about this article? I thought you said you never read about yourself online. You know how many crazy people there are out there."

            "I didn't. A friend of mine sent it to me. I _tried_ not to read it, but I couldn't help it when I saw pictures of you. It's an invasion of our privacy. It's happened before, but now that I've retired, I've had _enough_ of it."

Tatianna sighs.

            "You _are_ a celebrity in your homeland, though. Don't forget that."

            "That's not the point. I don't want my personal life pried into to this degree. That's why I stopped living in my old tower; the fans didn't have the least decency to give me privacy. Do you want to wake up and go to work with cameras flashing in your face, rumors that I'm cheating on you?"

            "What do you suppose, then? We move to Siberia?"

Ville frowns. Tatianna sighs, picking up her bag and walking into the house. Ville stays outside to clean up his yard. Tatianna can't help but notice that he had cooked, and her growling stomach leads her to the kitchen. She didn't expect _everything_ to always be perfect. Realistically, relationships, life, love, didn't work out that way. She thinks back to the conversation between Ville and Jelenä at the elevators and tries to remember what Jelenä said.

            A phone call from Tatianna's mother telling her about the article doesn't make the situation any easier. She walks into the living room and pulls the shade back to find that Ville is starting into the house.

            "Mami," she sighs, frustrated that even back home, she's starting to get attention in the media. She hadn't told her mother that she was planning to stay in Finland. She hadn't told anyone back home. She didn't want them to think she was being reckless, just picking up her life and moving it for one man.

            "No… _no se_ …"

She sighs, explaining to her mother that Ville loves her and takes care of her, that she doesn't know when she'll be home. The call ends on a less than favorable note. Tatianna turns around to find Ville standing in the doorway. She gasps, not having heard him, and wondering how long he's been standing there.

            "I'm sorry…are you okay? Did something happen at home?"

            "It was just my mom," she says, not wanting to tell him _why_ she'd called.

            "Is everything okay?" Ville asks again, clearly concerned.

Tatianna smiles, nodding. He walks over to her to hold her.

            "I'm sorry. I know I can be difficult sometimes, kulta." They exchange glances for a while, Ville rubbing Tatianna's back in circles. She grins. He kisses her lovingly on the cheek, his hands chilly from being outside for too long.

            "And I was hoping you'd say yes to going to dinner for my mother's birthday in…about four hours. It's a family event, and I've been debating whether or not to ask if you want to go. But seeing as word about us is already out, I'd like to take you with me. I'd rather the people I know see you for who you _really_ are, not as some monster trying to use me to further her career."

Tatianna smiles.

            "I'd be honored, Ville."

 

            Meeting Jesse for the second time, Tatianna can barely bring herself to look him in the eyes at first. Ville punches his brother playfully in the arm, mumbling to him after he shakes Tatianna's hand. Ville blushes insanely, wrapping a tight, possessive arm around Tatianna's middle.

            "Happy to see you," Jesse says genuinely.

            "Kiitos," Tatianna smiles. Jesse cocks a brow, admiring Tatianna's quickness to pick up on Finnish. It becomes clearer to Tatianna that Jesse doesn't speak very good English, but she uses it as an opportunity to learn more. At the dinner table in a nice restaurant, he tells her about himself, his band, stories about Ville from when they were younger, all the while, Ville's arm wrapped around her middle under the table. His mother had greeted her with such affection, as if they'd known each other for a long time, his father just as warm. Tatianna feels comfortable very quickly. Ville kisses her on the cheek lingeringly. She splits her sparkling cider with him, noticing that neither Ville's mom, dad, nor brother order any alcoholic drinks. She finds it sweet how much they support him and love him.

            No one bothers to bring up the tabloids, either, which allows Tatianna to get through the evening more comfortably. Maybe they never even saw any articles or pictures in the first place. Ville's mother opens the bracelet Tatianna had bought for her, admiring it deeply before Ville's father secures it around her wrist. Tatianna leans against Ville's ear.

            "Your parents are _so_ cute," she says. He laughs before telling them what Tatianna had said. The couple repay the compliment. By the time Ville is opening the front door, Tatianna is hopeful that the next time she sees Jelenä, it won't even faze her. She had more friends than enemies to make, and the new job opportunity would be a great way to make this happen. But she can't help wanting to know what it was that Jelenä was saying the previous day at the elevators.

            After lying in bed for a few minutes, trying to catch her breath while Ville traces her naked hip with wandering fingers, she asks him again what Jelenä must have said.

            "This again?" Ville asks, smiling with difficulty. He props himself up on his elbow and stares at the ceiling, as if in a daze, brunette hair falling damply against his cheek and dusting a pale shoulder.

            "She called you dirty names. That's all," Ville explains.

            "What? Like the ones you won't teach me?"

He cups her chin.

            "Yes, because I refuse to hear you speak that way, sweetheart. Now get some sleep, alright? You're going to need energy tomorrow if you plan to face her again."

Ville pulls her to his frame, tucking himself comfortably behind her and sighing. She doesn't bother to pry about the confrontation any longer, deciding it's too late at night to upset Ville. She has come to learn that she hates fighting with him. She traces the tattoo of Baudelaire on his arm. Gradually, he stops kissing the back of her head and nods off. The thought of meeting with Jelenä again cause Tatianna to stay awake a while longer.

 

            Ville wakes Tatianna by massaging her neck with his fingers. When she comes to, she finds him smiling over her. She reaches up to caress his face. The way that the sun shines in through the curtain gives Ville this glow that makes him look seraphic.

            "Kultaseni," Ville sighs, kissing her forehead a long moment. Tatianna stirs.

            "What time is it?"

            "Eight thirty," Ville informs in that delightfully deep voice.

            "Oh, don't tell me you have to go to work now."

            "Not until ten today. I was going to sleep until closer to nine."

            "I'm sorry. I just couldn't help waking you." Ville laughs lightly. In truth, he'd nightmared about his ex. In the nightmare, she'd beaten Tatianna up far worse than what actually happened. The last thing Ville remembers is holding Tatianna's lifeless form in his arms before Jelenä dragged him away by the hair into a darkness he never wanted to enter again. He hadn't been able to fall asleep again.

            "Hello," Tatianna says dreamily, "That feels good...don't stop." Ville smiles against her neck, and peeling the quilt back, admires the sleeping body that meets his gaze. Tatianna hadn't bothered to put any clothes back on after they'd thoroughly shared each other's bodies the previous night. She groans, shifting sideways.

            "Just ten more minutes," she mutters.

            "I thought you didn't want me to stop." Tatianna giggles.

            "Yes, keep going," she admits, "but I'm sorry. I won't be putting any effort in." Ville laughs genuinely. He continues to kiss her all over, regardless. After a moment, he sighs, resting his head on her side. A hand gently fondles his hair.

            "'S wrong, mi amor?" Even without looking at him, she can tell when something is on his mind.

            "Well...I had a nightmare," Ville admits, "About _her_." Tatianna turns onto her back.

            "You need to stop worrying and enjoy your...Ville?"

Tears roll out of his closed eyes. Tatianna sits up, cupping Ville's cheeks in her hands. His shoulders are shaking in his silent weeping.

            "Oh, baby...it was only a dream." When an audible whimper escapes his lips, Tatianna pulls Ville to her chest. She holds on tight, finding him limp in her embrace. She can tell that something else is wrong. He doesn't seem to be himself. Tatianna pulls back to face him, and Ville avoids her gaze.

            "She really broke your heart...what did she do? Is it about the kid you could have had?"

Ville closes his eyes, tilting his head to the side and shaking it.

            "Ville...please talk to me..." she caresses his cheek and shoulder lovingly.

            "She really hurt me," he finally says, "and I'm scared for you."

            "She _did_ hit you, didn't she? When you were together?"

Ville closes his eyes, nodding. It all finally makes sense to Tatianna then. Her eyes water.

            "Why didn't you tell me?"

            "I didn't know how. I didn't think I'd have to, and then she bumped into you and..." Ville shrugs. When he meets Tatianna's gaze again, he finds her wiping her eyes.

            "Now you see why I can't stand for you to be anywhere near her...thought she was gonna kill me once."

Not knowing what else to say, Tatianna just hugs him very tightly.

            "You should've told me...I would never love you any less. That just...breaks my heart."

            "I guess I thought if you knew how damaged I was, you wouldn't want to be with me."

            "Never, baby. Never," Tatianna reassures him.

            "Ville, maybe you should talk to someone about what happened. Why didn't you ever go to the police?"

He sighs, stroking her hair absently.

            "I guess...I just really loved her. And I didn't want to mess up her life. And I didn't want to make a monster out of her...And, I felt like I deserved it for abandoning her and our kid."

            "My god, Ville. Who else knows?"

            "Just my mum. By now, I'll bet she's told dad. But he never brought it up. I guess he never wanted to make me relive the pain," Ville explains, playing with Tatianna's hair. His calmness unnerves her. If she didn't hate Jelenä before, this information makes her now.

            "Not even my brother knows—and I don't want him to. You understand?" He pauses a moment, looking her dead in the eyes.

            "Yeah," she nods.

            "Not even Linde, and I know he'd never tell anyone if I didn't want him to, quiet as he is. I felt badly about the way that I left things with Jelenä. I think that's why I just...let it go. She once broke this glass vase of orchids over my head. It was after an argument. I was only trying to convince her that I wasn't cheating."

            "Ville...this bothers me. I want to see her in jail."

Ville's eyes widen. Tatianna's generally sweet and cherubic demeanor transforms into a dark cloud, seething with anger and thoughts of revenge. She looks so angry, yet the emotion fails to rob Tatianna of her beauty.

            "You've got to press assault charges on her or something. She shouldn't be able to get away with that."

            "Tatia, it would be too little too late."

            "Ville," she whimpers. He smiles and wipes a tear from her eye.

            "Besides, there's really no evidence now. Why bother?"

Tatianna shakes her head in disbelief.

            "She can't hurt me anymore. I'm starting to think that you were right, sweetheart. We can't let this ruin us. Just do what you have to do for the magazine and make it big for yourself."

He cups Tatianna's cheeks.

            "Then we'll do something to celebrate."

            "Like what?" she asks a bit sadly.

            "We'll…take a holiday, somewhere far the fuck away from the media—somewhere remote. Just you and I. How does that sound?" Gradually, Tatianna gives Ville a smile.

            "That's my girl."

She hugs him tightly, the heat of her breasts soothing against his heart.

            "Can I still come see you for lunch today?" Ville asks, kissing her shoulder.

            "You can see me anytime you want," she explains. They sit and chat idly until Tatianna glances at the clock. She crawls out of bed and searches through the hamper of clean clothes she has yet to fold.

            "Crap. I should have ironed something," she mutters, standing in front of the mirror with a wrinkled blouse pinned to her chest. Ville watches her, captivated. She continues to get ready, disappearing to the bathroom for a shower. He picks up the basket of clothes and carries it to the room where Tatianna hasn't even slept. He'd thought for sure she would have, considering the tiff they had the other day. He searches his closet for an iron and gets to work on the blouse that Tatianna had picked out, including a pair of formfitting black slacks he remembers her wearing the day that they met.

            Ville makes his bed and places the clothes there neatly before going through Tatianna's shoes in his closet. She has a pair of thick-heeled, velvety, black shoes that he decides will go nicely with her outfit. He places them at the foot of the bed with her clothes, along with the lingerie he had bought her the day after they slept together for the first time. He grins at his work a moment before rolling the suitcase back to Tatianna's room. She'd been living out of the thing, not bothering to put the items away. Ville sympathizes, recalling his many years touring the world and living with wrinkled pants every week. One could grow weary of pulling out all of their clothes only to stuff them back into a suitcase when looking for just one shirt.

            He makes himself busy ironing Tatianna's clothes and folding them in piles neatly atop the lilac bedspread he got her at Ikea. Her things smell beautiful, just like her, and Ville doesn't even hear Tatianna walking down the hall until she catches him with his nose buried in her favorite blood red bra. She laughs and he turns around out of his daze.

            "You are…the _cutest_ man I have ever seen," Tatianna explains. Ville looks her up and down to find her looking extremely professional in the blouse and slacks he'd ironed for her. She has her arms crossed in the doorway, watching him topless in flannel pajama pants, looking like he's been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. Ville blushes, dropping the bra on the ironing board. The black heels give Tatianna a few extra inches, so that she's able to meet his lips when she saunters over to kiss him. She hadn't even asked nor expected Ville to start dealing with her laundry, but he was humming like he was in some kind of bliss when she caught him ironing.

            "But don't iron the bras, or anything lacey. It'll tear apart," she explains, rubbing her lip gloss off his bottom lip.

            "I'm new at this," Ville grins, "Don't you think I'll make the _perfect_ house husband?" he asks. Tatianna's heart skips a beat. He's already thinking about _marriage_?! She stops rubbing his mouth to laugh.

            "What?" Ville asks, laughing reluctantly.


	8. Chapter 8

 "Can you please lift your shoulder a bit higher?" Tatianna asks. Jelenä acquiesces, keeping her smile. Tatianna clicks the last shot.

            "Thank you. I think we're through for now," she says. Jelenä sighs and places the weight she was lifting back on the rack. The music goes up a decibel and Tatianna glances about the fitness center.

            "If you don't mind now, I think I'm gonna go workout," Jelenä explains, pulling a pair of sweatbands out of her gym bag. Tatianna nods, clicking her camera off.

            "You know something, girl," Jelenä adds, just before Tatianna is about to start walking away. Tatianna pauses.

            "It's Tatia," she says calmly. Jelenä rolls her eyes a moment.

            "Tatia," she says, "You better be careful with that man."

            "Excuse me?" Tatianna asks. She works with every fiber of her being  not to explode.

            "You _know_ who I'm talking about," Jelenä says, lowering her voice and taking a few steps towards Tatianna. Tatianna backs up a bit and Jelenä stops advancing, smiling with a small laugh through her nose and pausing where she stands. Tatianna begins to wonder whether the woman _likes_ the fact that she's terrified of her.

            "I don't care if you print this, because it will make _you_ look like fool, too. And I don't know if you are just band groupie—maybe that's why he's with you. But you'd better hope you don't get pregnant. If you do, he will leave you so fast, he'll be gone before you can even pee on the stick. If you don't believe me, I speak from personal experience."

            "…If you don’t mind, I'd rather leave Ville out of this entirely," Tatianna explains, gesturing with her hands as if she's had enough, "I'm able to be civilized with you if you'll be civilized with me."

Jelenä shrugs carelessly.

            "Well, girl to girl, I'm just warning you," Jelenä adds before walking off to the treadmills. Tatianna stands there, watching her walk off, wanting to retort, but Jelenä is already  out of earshot. Anger grounds her there for a while before she finally leaves. She thinks that it would only be fair for Jelenä to let her take a free shout at her beautiful face after she tried to choke her. She wonders for a moment, on her way into a taxi, what exactly Jelenä's point of view on her past relationship with Ville really is. Does she think he was entirely in the wrong? Even if Ville abandoned her, he was a different man all those years ago. Even if he had ever treated Jelenä horribly, it didn't give her the right to ever put her hands on him. Tatianna pictures Jelenä screaming at Ville, hitting him, and the thought actually brings her to tears.

            The cab driver looks back at her with concern once he stops outside of the magazine's headquarters. He asks her in Finnish if she's alright.

            "Anteeksi—kiitos," Tatianna utters, hastily paying and making her way out of the cab. She starts towards the revolving doors, wiping her eyes, only to bump very hard into someone. She looks up through tears into the face of the person who has grabbed her shoulders. When she finds that it's Ville, she stops apologizing.

            " _What did she do_?" Ville demands, wiping Tatianna's eyes with the back of his fingers. Once again, she'd forgotten that he was coming to bring her lunch. Jelenä had gotten under her skin, and she'd been thinking about the incident the entire ride back from the photo shoot. Ville's eyes are wide with fear, his teeth barred angrily. He places the bag of food he was carrying on the ground, gripping Tatianna's waist.

            "Honey, tell me what that little bitch did."

Tatianna shakes her head vigorously.

            "I'm—" she sniffles, shaking her head.

            "Come on," Ville says, pulling Tatianna by the shoulders back towards the cab she'd just rushed out of. He didn't even bother to pick up the food.

            "We're going home," he says, pulling the cab door open.

            "And then I'm going to slam this piece of shit magazine with a fatass lawsuit. They _know_ that's my ex and they _know_ they shouldn't have had you working with her—"

            "No—Ville," Tatianna pipes up, finally finding her voice. She presses against his chest, stopping him from getting her into the cab. She sighs, taking a deep breath.

            "No, what? You should have seen your face just now," he says, clearly put off at the thought of Jelenä messing with her.

            "She didn't touch me," Tatianna explains, "She was just…" Tatianna shakes her head, staring off into space.

            "I don't care. You're done working here," Ville says gently, kissing her forehead for a long moment.

            "She just told me that…" Tatianna sighs, clutching the sleeves of Ville's jacket, his lips still pressed to her forehead.

            "She was just…"

            "Come on," he says gently, pressing her to get into the cab. When Tatianna looks up at him, she finds Ville glaring across the street. She turns to look in his direction to find someone with a camera, snapping away at them. Knowing they're practically being stalked is the straw that breaks the camel's back. Ville shouts angrily across the street in Finnish. The photographer puts the camera down for a moment with an awkward smile on his face before he keeps shooting. Ville just about pushes Tatianna into the cab before she can utter another word. He gives the driver an address, asking him to hurry.

            As the cab pulls away, Tatianna is still in awe at the way that Ville was screaming over at the photographer. She hasn't seen him _that_ angry before. She clutches his hand and he turns to her as if he'd forgotten she was there. He's clearly bothered.

            "I'm sorry about that…I just _lost it_. I don't want to see you in tears every day—no, no, no, no, no," he says, shaking his head adamantly, "I won't have it." He kisses Tatianna's forehead again, rubbing her back. After a moment, she smiles. Ville grins.

            "Did she touch you?" he asks again.

            "No, not at all. She was just saying…bad things about you. I didn't like it. That's all," Tatianna explains, not bothering to fight with Ville about going back to work. She decides that she'll call her manager to say that she became ill after the shoot and had to go home. She still felt determined to work for the magazine, at least long enough to make some money. She's used to providing for herself, even though Ville definitely has more money than her and doesn't seem to mind taking care of her. She rests her head against his chest.

            When the car pulls up in front of a small house that isn't Ville's, Tatianna looks out the window.

            "Where are we?" she asks, "What is this?"

Ville looks down at Tatianna and merely smiles. He pays the driver before helping Tatianna out of the car.

            "Where are we?" she asks again.

            "Come on," Ville says, clutching her hand. He leads her up the front steps. He rings the bell and waits. Tatianna looks around and takes in a rather rural landscape. She knows they're no longer in the city.

            "You forgot the food back there," she says absently. Clearly not bothered by this, Ville rings the bell again.

            "That's alright," he says. Someone mutters from inside, and when Ville's mother answers the door, she's clearly elated to see the two of them. Tatianna steals a glance at him before she opens the screen door with arms waiting for a hug. She kisses Tatianna on the cheek, and her thoughts immediately brighten, Jelenä falling away as she steps over the threshold. The woman kisses her son before closing the front door and inviting them in, explaining that she was just making lunch and that they should eat. As Ville leads Tatianna into the kitchen, she realizes why he brought her here. He'd always confided in his mother about things. She was his heart in many ways, and after seeing Tatianna hurt like she was, he wanted to share this with her. It hits Tatianna then how much Ville must love her. He could be stubborn about things, but his intentions always come from the heart.

            Tatianna feels completely at home as she sits across from Ville at a small table in the kitchen, sipping a mug of tea. The table is so small that Ville's knees meet Tatianna's underneath it. This makes her want to laugh and she just smiles. He keeps his eyes on her gladly as his mother goes about the kitchen making them plates.

            "Better?" Ville asks, clutching Tatianna's hand from across the table. She nods. He addresses his mother in Finnish, asking if dad is at the shop. Tatianna listens to their small talk. She imagines Ville growing up in this house, getting taller, every thought pulling at her heartstrings. Ville's mother is so warm to her that she doesn't want to go by the time they are leaving. In the back of a cab (luckily with a different driver), Tatianna can't stop smiling at Ville. Eventually he giggles.

            "What is it, sweetheart?"

            "I just adore you," she breathes. Ville turns to her, planting a meaningful kiss on her lips. She keeps her eyes closed, even after his lips depart.

            "I don't want to see you crying anymore," he says, rubbing her cheek with his thumb, "Not ever…It's just you and me now, sweetheart." Tatianna sighs, never wanting to wake from this beautiful dream.

 

            "I can't believe I'm allowing this to happen," Ville states with crossed arms, standing behind Tatianna at the mirror where she's brushing on bareMinerals and blush. He sighs again.

            "You're coming with me, aren’t you? Everything's going to be just fine," she explains, turning to look at him in his black suit. She had to spend the weekend talking him out of filing a lawsuit against POP magazine. The night of the athlete's pageant has arrived and Tatianna has to be there to take photos, particularly of Jelenä.

            "Relax, please?" she says, pausing to kiss Ville before doing her lipstick. Ville smiles halfway.

            "How can I? I swear, if she makes you cry _again_ , I'm carrying you off the stage myself," Ville explains. Tatianna laughs to herself for a moment, but she can tell that Ville is serious. She had to explain to him that working was important to her, and always has been. Photography and writing are her passions, and she couldn't bear to give those things up for good, even if it meant working with his ex. For the sake of wanting to make her happy, Ville agreed to _try_ to stop being so grumpy about her job at the magazine. So far, he has been about 60% less dramatic, and Tatianna had made a point not to come home crying because of something stupid Jelenä said to her. Ville sighs, this time with an air of longing as he stares at Tatianna in her little black dress. He walks up to her behind the mirror, dipping his face into her neck and kissing.

            "No, no, no—" she says, shooing him off, "I already had to cover that hickey you gave me and I don't have time to re-do this makeup," she states. Ville laughs mischievously, continuing at her neck. For a moment, Tatianna leans back into him and moans.

            "No—we're gonna be late, mi amor," she says, pushing Ville off her back. He sighs with discontent, walking over to the bed to put his shoes on. Tatianna has never been with someone Ville's age, not that he's really old to begin with, but never had she experienced such a sex drive in a relationship. Ville could pine for her relentlessly all day, even after they'd gone to bed three or four times. Everything he does feels good, but she can't help wondering about what Jelenä had said the other day. After standing in front of the mirror, thinking for so long, it startles Tatianna to feel Ville's body pressed up against hers.

            "We’re not staying for any after parties, are we?" he asks, pressing his hand atop hers on the bureau. She had been working more hours, and that means less time at home with Ville. Almost as soon as she walks in the door at the end of the day, he's all over her. She tilts her head to the side to let him kiss at the same side of her neck where she hadn't had to use concealer on his love marks.

            "Honestly, I'm surprised you're going. As soon as people see you, they're going to ask for pictures and autographs."

            "That's fine. I'm happy to deal with it and keep an eye on you at the same time."

When Ville starts trailing a hand up her thigh, lifting her dress, Tatianna looks up at him cocking a brow. Ville smiles and she grips his wrist where his hand is beginning to drift between her thighs.

            "If you be a good boy, I'll give you your own private little after party," Tatianna promises, kissing Ville's chin.

            " _Ohhh_ ," he says with delight as she walks towards the door. He grabs his jacket to follow her outside.

 

            Ville stands by Tatianna like a shadow backstage as she follows Jelenä, documenting her in the moments where she's getting ready for the pageant. Ville hasn't spoken a word since being in Jelenä's presence, but as she's applying makeup, he gently tugs on Tatianna's ponytail. She turns to face him, and he kisses her much more passionately than what's normally acceptable for public displays of affection. Jelenä is looking at them with a blank stare when he pulls away. She quickly turns back to her mirror.

            "Tell your boyfriend to go away. You're on _my_ time now," Jelenä explains, standing in a bikini and crossing her arms. By now, a few of the other contestants are gossiping about Ville, some of them not having been sure whether it was actually him. Tatianna shrugs.

            "He's my plus one for the show. He's not bothering anyone," Tatianna explains calmly. Jelenä rolls her eyes.

            "Okay, so I guess that's how your _manager_ will see it if I told him you were making out backstage the entire night."

            "It's okay, sweetheart. I'll be in the front row saving our seats," Ville says, kissing Tatianna's cheek. He walks away reluctantly, glancing back and glaring at Jelenä, who smiles almost wickedly when he catches her eye. Jelenä sighs satisfactorily and turns towards the mirror to do her lipstick.

            "You know, you didn't have to do that. He wasn't even talking to you."

            "Not the point. I don't want that bastard in my presence."

Tatianna begins to reach her boiling point. Ville had told her on the way over not to let Jelenä work her nerves, that it wasn't worth it to get into a fight over. Tatianna clenches her fists as Jelenä laughs, chattering with another contestant. She stares at the women's muscles; Ville hadn't been wrong about underestimating Jelenä. She could have beaten Tatianna to a pulp if she wanted to. A man appears carrying a small boy. Jelenä lights up, and for a moment, almost looks angelic. She picks up her son, the little boy staring at her starry-eyed, perhaps not used to seeing his mother in so much makeup. He laughs and Tatianna starts snapping away at the Kodak moment. She tries to take her mind off Jelenä and focus on the smiling boy.

            Jelenä and her husband kiss, and Tatianna snaps another shot. Tatianna's phone vibrates in her pocket. She swipes the screen open to find a text from Ville, asking her how she's holding up. She responds by telling him she cannot believe a man actually settled for this woman, wondering whether Jelenä beat him into submission. She stuffs her phone back into her pocket to walk around backstage and get more candids of some of the contestants fixing their hair last minute. When Jelenä's husband and child leave to go to their seats in the crowd, Jelenä turns her attention back to Tatianna.

            "Like I said before the right is my best side, so I'll be turning on stage when I walk out. Make sure you get me right."

At that moment, Tatianna nearly loses her shit, but she holds it in.

            "Jelenä?"

            "What?"

            "You're no fucking angel."

            "Excuse me?" Jelenä's eyebrows clench angrily.

            "I know what you did to Ville, all those years ago."

Jelenä looks at Tatianna like she's an idiot, sitting down to step into a pair of heels.

            "Oh yeah? And what did I do to that asshole, exactly?"

            "I could ruin you with just _one_ article. You assaulted him, on several occasions. Don't act like you don't know."

            "How _dare_ you threaten me? You don't fucking know me. And you _don't know_ what kind of prick Ville used to be."

            "You kicked him while wearing heels because you thought he was having an affair, you smashed a vase over his head, you were verbally abusive…You beat him up because he didn't want to have a kid with you. I'm not the only one who knows about it. I've seen photos of him with that black eye. That was you, wasn't it?"

Jelenä scoffs. She rubs some lotion into her hands and begins slathering it up her long legs.

            "So, you're saying it was okay that he abandoned me when I found out I was pregnant?"

            "No," Tatianna sighs, "I'm saying that what you did to him in response was _wrong_. Unless you're actually mentally ill, I think you know that. Tell me, do you beat your husband, too?"

Jelenä stands up, enraged. She looks like she's about to do something, but she simmers down, her eyes flitting around a moment; there are too many witnesses. Tatianna is satisfied that she managed to get under the woman's skin.

            "Look, don't be angry because you're dating a weak little pussy. _That_ is not my problem." Jelenä admits it.

            "Did I ever beat him? _Yes_. Did he deserve it when I did? Yeah! Now stop fucking with my head because I need to focus so I can win this competition. Go wait out there and do your job."

Tatianna stands there smiling from ear to ear. Jelenä stares at her, pausing in putting on her lotion.

            "Are you fucking _stupid_? Go away," she sneers. Tatianna is amazed to see how this woman can go from totally kind, gentle and sweet, as she had been with her son, to bitchy and arrogant in a split second. Tatianna walks away with utter satisfaction. She pulls a small recorder that she'd pilfered from the supply room at work out of the bust of her dress and plays the conversation back to herself, Jelenä's voice crystal clear: "Did I ever beat him? _Yes_. Did he deserve it when I did? Yeah!" She decides to keep this excitement to herself for the time being. She won't even tell Ville about it until she brings the evidence to the police. She spots Ville in the crowd where he smiles at her, completely unsuspecting.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything I want in life is hidden in these stories...

            On her way off the stage, Tatianna is still smiling. Someone photographing the contestants takes her picture as she makes her way to Ville. She doesn't even care that the camera is still flashing when she's right beside Ville. He holds out a drink to her.

            "D'you want the rest of this? I hate sparkling juice," Ville admits. Tatianna laughs and takes the cup from him. She downs the sparkling raspberry cider in one mouthful before sitting down.

            "Why are you smiling so big?" Ville asks, having been staring at Tatianna for a few seconds.

            "Is it because we're on camera?" He can't help smiling himself.

            "I'm just…very happy," she says, kissing him. He smiles, cupping her hand. Someone beside him chats with him, pointing to the cameras. Ville smiles and laughs a lot, gesturing to Tatianna. She can get the gist of the conversation, blushing every other minute. They watch the rest of the show until it's time to meet with Jelenä again backstage.

            "Did you get my right side—?"

Jelenä pauses upon spotting Ville right behind Tatianna. Jelenä glares, crossing her arms over her second place badge.

            "Yes. That and more," Tatianna promises, rolling through her shots to show Jelenä one she thinks she'll approve of. Jelenä doesn't even look at the camera. Ville's arm wraps around Tatianna from behind and he sighs.

            "I told you not to bring him back here," she says. Tatianna sighs.

            "We're leaving as soon as you look at the damn photos," Ville promises. Jelenä tells him not to address her, speaking in Finnish.

            "Jelenä, congratulations," Tatianna says, feigning her best excitement. She feels Ville stifle a laugh behind her.

            "Now, just pick a picture you'll want as the opener for my article and we're done here."

Jelenä continues to glare at Ville for a few more seconds before holding the camera. She shakes her head a couple of times, scoffing. Ville fights the urge to reprimand her so hard that it feels like there's a fire in his throat. He hates to see her be so nasty to Tatia. He keeps his mouth shut.

            " _That_ one," Jelenä says, thrusting the camera back into Tatianna's hands.

            "Thank you for your cooperation," Tatianna says professionally. Jelenä simply turns to the mirror and starts to straighten her hair. Ville pulls Tatianna backwards and she turns around to leave with him. He sighs with utter relief.

            "Thank _god_ that's over."

Tatianna laughs. In the cab, she begins to feel less victorious and more guilty as she recalls Ville telling her he thought it would be too little too late to go after Jelenä with assault charges. More than that, she recalls the look in Ville's eyes when he'd told her that he never wanted his brother to know what happened with him and Jelenä. She wonders whether this is more so because he doesn't want to be seen as weak, or because he would hate to set a bad example for his little brother if Jesse knew that Ville left his own pregnant girlfriend for work. Suddenly, she wants badly to ask him, but Ville is repeatedly telling her in Finnish to look at the moon outside the cab. He clutches the back of her knee and she pops out of her thoughts.

            Unbuckling Tatianna's seatbelt, Ville pulls her into his lap so that she can look where he's looking. She smiles, finding it cute the way that he often does this to teach her; talk about something and point until she gets it. She repeats the words back to him, eying the full, white, gemlike moon.

            "Kuu," Ville stresses, pressing his lips to Tatianna's ear, making her shiver. She repeats the word back to him until she says it correctly.

            "Hyvä tyttö," Ville says, kissing her cheek. Heat rushes to her chest when he strokes her legs under her dress. She recalls what she'd promised him hours earlier and only hopes that the cab driver can't see what he's doing to her in the back seat.

            "Now," Ville starts, pushing her legs apart and grazing her inner thigh with the tips of his fingers, "Tell me how to say it in Spanish." She gasps when his thumb grazes her clit through her panties. Throwing both hands over her mouth, she attempts to slide off of Ville's lap, but he holds her in place. She fights a laugh.

            "L-Luna," she says in a shaky voice.

            "I like that," Ville says, sliding his hands up her dress again. Tatianna realizes that he's going to torture her like this until they get home. By the time Ville presses her up against the door, reaching under her dress to pull her panties down, she's momentarily distracted by the lust in his eyes as he kneels on the floor, pulling the garment all the way off. And when she sighs, letting her back hit the door, the tiny recorder falls out of her bust, bouncing off of Ville's head before falling on the floor beside him. Her heart stops. Ville laughs and picks it up.

            "Huh? Looks like your breasts dropped something, kultaseni," he says, eying the device curiously. Before he can press the button that will play back Jelenä's confession, Tatianna grabs it from Ville. He looks up at her with a cocked brow before making his way back to his feet.

            "I had to interview her a little bit before the show," Tatianna explains, rolling the device in her hands. She steps to the side, evading Ville and picking up her purse where she'd dropped it on the floor. She shoves the small recorder inside, hiding it in one of the zip compartments in the lining of her purse. She places her purse on the small table by the door. Ville comes up behind her, pinning her against the table, groaning like a starving wolf.

            "Now, I vaguely remember you promising me my own after party," Ville says intentionally deepening his voice even further, the words filled with rabid lust. The sound makes her shiver. He pulls Tatianna's hair out of its neat ponytail, locking a set of warm fingers around the back of her neck. She sighs, closing her eyes when he starts kissing hard into her flesh. She can't focus  now, not since that recorder popped out of her dress, Ville having no idea what it contained. She leans forward, out of his grasp, turning around and faking a smile.

            " _Tänne, kultaseni_ ," he says, grinning and pulling her waist against him, letting her feel his growing excitement. He closes his eyes a moment, inhaling through barred teeth, pulling Tatianna's buttocks forward, making her feel his erection against her lower stomach. She smiles shyly, pressing on his chest. Ville stops grinning and looks a bit confused. He tacitly asks her what the problem is, smoothing his hands comfortingly through her hair.

            "I'm just really tired," she says. Ville smiles.

            "Come on. Let's get a shower and go to sleep." He starts towards the stairs, but Tatianna stays put.

            "I just want to go through these photos and jot down some stuff from the night for my article. You go ahead. I'll be right there."

Ville gives her a puppylike frown, causing Tatianna to laugh. He smiles.

            "Okay, sweetheart. Take your time," he says, kissing the back of her hand before starting up the stairs, singing something in Finnish absently while tucking her underwear into the pocket of his blazer. She sighs, deflating when Ville can no longer see her. She hopes that he's not onto her already, considering the way she lied and brushed him off.

 

            Ville is sitting up in bed, writing on pieces of paper when Tatianna returns from her shower. The lights are low, only the lamp on the nightstand lit. Ville lights up the room even more with his smile when he sees her. She had grabbed a t-shirt and a pair of underwear to sleep in from the drawer in her room before making her way back to Ville's. Carrying her lotion, she sits in bed and starts rubbing it on. She stares at the wall, debating with herself whether or not to tell Ville what she's done. _Will he be angry?_

            When she reaches for the bottle of lotion on the bed again, she doesn't feel it. Ville's hands slather lotion down her arms from behind. He kisses the back of her head, pulling her into his lap to do her legs and abdomen, never shying away from her breasts and the mounds of her bottom. He kisses her with a lot of tongue, and she feels almost like she can't breathe. His skin is warm from bathing and it invites her as she presses her hands to his chest. Distracted by him touching her all over, she forgets about Jelenä's confession for another moment.

            "Are you okay, baby?" Ville asks, once Tatianna has made it onto her back beneath the quilt.

            "Hmm?" she sighs, wrapping her arms around his neck.

            "You seem…distracted, or something."

Tatianna looks away. She feels Ville's stomach expand against her as he takes a deep breath.

            "You know, I would never abandon you. _Never_ , baby. If Jelenä told you things about me to make you turn away, I want you to know that I'm _not_ the man now that I was when I was with her…I love you."

The desperation in his expression causes Tatianna to feel guiltier.

            "What's wrong?" he asks softly, easing up off her a little bit. She could feel him growing hard between her legs.

            "Tatia?"

            "Nothing," she promises, cupping his cheeks and sitting up against a pillow. She sighs. Ville looks at her funny. She wonders just how long she'll be able to keep her little secret from him.

            "You're acting kinda strange," he says, grinning a little bit.

            "H-how?" she asks, laughing, rubbing Ville's shoulders. Ville tilts his head to the side, blinking, trying to figure her out. Tatianna sinks under him a bit, hastily pulling down his boxers, parting her legs, and pulling him down to meet her. Ville fumbles with himself hastily, searching, and sinking deeply inside her. He groans and she's able to avoid further conversation for a few minutes. She hadn't realized how tightly her eyes were closed. Ville pauses in his motions.

            "Are you comfortable, darling?" he asks, surprised at Tatianna's lack of wetness. It makes it harder to set a pace. She opens her eyes, sighing, pulling his body against hers. They don't speak again, but the eye contact begins to bother Tatianna; Ville is still trying to figure her out. He decides she just didn't like having to be around Jelenä and leaves it at that. She eases into the rocking of Ville's hips, the sensation of him filling her, beginning to moan. His green-hazel eyes continue to search her soul and she looks away, closing her eyes and making more noise, trying to get as animated as she can in the hopes that Ville will stop asking questions with his eyes. Her excitement excites him further and he finishes, collapsing on her for a moment, sweetly kissing her chest.

            "Goodnight, mi amor," she says softly, pulling a hand through Ville's hair and reaching to turn off the lamp.

 

            She doesn't bother to wake him the following morning. Rain drenches the ground as she steps outside of the house and starts for a taxi. The lazy Saturday morning sets her at some ease. When she arrives at the police station she'd looked up, she just stands there unsurely. After convincing herself that it's worth it for Ville to be upset with her, Tatianna starts for the door. In Finnish she asks to speak with an officer, then asks if he speaks English. He smiles and nods, leading her to his desk.

            "What may I help you with today, miss?"

Tatianna sighs, pulling her purse open.

            "I don't know how this works, or if you'll really be able to help me at all, but I know somebody who was assaulted by his girlfriend years ago. I actually have her confession," Tatianna states, holding the recorder up.

            "May I hear it?" the officer asks. Jelenä plays it for him, afterwards placing the recorder on the table. He picks it up, eying it.

            "Exactly how much time has passed since the assault?"

            "Uhm," Tatianna closes her eyes, "Uh…about ten years."

The officer's eyes widen.

            "What is the nature of the assault?"

            "My boyfriend was physically abused by his ex. I know this is something that happened so long ago—but I only just recently found out. And I want to do something about it."

            "I understand. Can you tell me everything that you know? And we'll take it from there."

She spends about ten minutes giving the officer all the information she knows. When he asks her for Ville's name, he looks at her with disbelief for a moment. But he continues taking the notes. Tatianna admits that Jelenä had gotten into an altercation with her weeks ago at a concert as well.   "This is quite a story, ma'am."

            "It's all true," Tatianna states, trying not to sound too defensive. The officer grins kindly.

            "I appreciate your concern for Mr. Valo. You are clearly a good person. But I am afraid that if the victim himself is not willing to go through with any charges—aside from a lack of evidence not including this confession—it would be difficult to go much further." Tatianna sighs.

            "Will you consider wanting to still do something about this woman attacking you a few weeks ago? The most I can do is get some background on Mr. Valo's ex, see if she has any other reported history of violence. With that, I can assist you in getting a restraining order against her." Tatianna knows she's here for Ville more than anything else.

            "I must say, you look vaguely familiar," the officer adds. Tatianna's eyes had spotted an entertainment magazine at the front desk when she entered the police station. On the cover amongst the pictures was a shot of herself and Ville outside of where she works.

            "Yes, you may have seen me in the tabloids. I work for a magazine, but that's not why I'm here. I'm here for Ville."

            "Alright. I will need to speak with Mr. Valo himself in order to follow these accusations."

            "You see, that's the problem. He doesn't want to do all of this. Are you sure you can't do _anything_ without him coming here himself?"

The officer frowns apologetically, shaking his head.

            "I'm afraid not, ma'am."

Tatianna smiles, "Thank you for your time." She picks up the recorder. The officer stands.

            "I urge you to try and convince Mr. Valo to come in. Then we can really work together. I'm sorry I can't do more."

            "Well, thank you."

Tatianna leaves the police station feeling unaccomplished. She takes a cab into Helsinki and stops at the same café where she'd gone with Ville on their first date in Finland. She mulls over what the officer said, stirring her cup of tea. Her phone vibrates on the table and she picks it up.

            "Mi amor," she says, grinning.

            "What are you up to today? I didn’t know you worked weekends," Ville says. She can hear him smiling on the other line.

            "Uh, yeah. I'm not. Just went to the office for a minute to do something. I'll be home soon," she reassures Ville.

            "It's no rush, baby, I just wondered where you were."

Her heart beats too fast as she listens to him.

            "Tatia?"

            "Hmmm?"

            "You sure you're alright, baby?"

She closes her eyes a long moment, her voice clear and calm when she speaks.

            "Of course, Ville."

            "I can't help feeling like…I don't know, there's something wrong since last night."

He's not letting it go. Even without him in her presence, she finds it difficult to lie to him.

            "Of course not. It's just been a busy week, starting this little gig and all."

            "How does Jamaica sound?" Ville asks. Tatianna smiles.

            "For what?"

            "Our getaway, kulta—remember?" he laughs genuinely. Tatianna slaps her palm against her forehead.

            "I was thinking we might go during Christmas, which is pretty much around the corner. Imagine that—hot beaches, _no snow_ , isolation together." He speaks enticingly, Tatianna clenching her knees together under the table, already turned on by the sound of his voice.

            "Okay."

            "Okay?"

            "Yes, okay," she laughs.

            "Brilliant. We should look at some resorts or hotels when you get home. Something we both like. And then I was thinking that we could take a spin in Spain as well, if you want to."

            "That sounds nice, mi amor."

            "I can't wait till you get home so you can see some of the places I've found."

            "I'll be there soon."

            "Bye, sweetheart."

Ville sounds so excited that Tatianna feels all the worse for bringing Jelenä's confession to the police. She knows that there is absolutely no way that this won't be brought to Ville's attention eventually. And just when she decides to get up and buy Ville a coffee, she stands there in line and her heart freezes. She almost addresses Ville, but when Jesse turns to the side, recognizing her, she breathes a sigh of relief. At certain angles, they could have been mistaken for twins. Jesse smiles.

            "Buenos días," he says. She smiles warmly.

            "How are you?" he asks.

            "Olen kunnossa."

Instead of trying to evade him, Tatianna makes small talk. Jesse asks her if she would like him to order for her. She tells him she's just grabbing a coffee for Ville before heading back to his place. Jesse hugs her when they depart, and as she watches him walk down the street, pulling his phone out of his pocket, she wonders whether he's texting Ville to tell him that they ran into each other.

            When she makes it back to Ville's, she hears a guitar playing before she finds him in the kitchen, sitting on the counter. He pauses upon seeing her, hopping down and placing his guitar there.

            "I brought you some coffee," she says, walking up where he's waiting to kiss her.

            "My love."

She watches him take a sip.

            "Jesse said he ran into you in the middle of Helsinki. Funny how that happens, right?"

            "Yeah," she says, turning away. Ville grabs her by the wrist, pulling her back to face him. He places the coffee on the counter, reading her face.

            "See, _that's_ what I'm talking about," he says with an anxious grin.

            "What?" she says, lifting a hand.

            "You are not okay. Why?"

He knows her too well already. She shrugs, avoiding Ville's gaze. He looks at her very hard, very curiously.

            "Why don’t you talk to me? Whatever it is, I'm sure you'll feel better once you get it off your chest," Ville says. He rubs her side with care.

            "Like I said, it's been a stressful week and I just want to relax."

            "You went out for coffee by yourself?" Ville asks, picking up the Styrofoam cup again. He still hasn't let go of Tatianna's wrist.

            "Yes…I needed some space from everything, I guess," she says. Ville releases her wrist.

            "That's okay…I just hope I'm not doing anything wrong," he admits.

            "Of course not, Ville. I'm _completely_ in love with you. Otherwise I wouldn't have stayed here with you." He smiles with relief.

            "Well, in that case, let me show you some of the vacation spots I've picked out. I need you to make the final decision," he explains, turning to his laptop on the counter. Tatianna is glad that Ville stands behind her while she looks at the pages. His hand rests patiently on the counter beside her. She places her left hand over Ville's, using the right one to control the mouse. His voice is very near at the back of her head when he talks about the details.

            "And I think you'd look insanely appetizing in a bikini here," he says, pointing to a picture of a beach. Tatianna laughs, leaning back against him. Being with him puts her at ease, even though she hates to lie.

            "What was that you were playing when I walked in?" she asks curiously.

            "Oh…just something obnoxious I've been working on," Ville says. Tatianna turns her head sideways to look back at him.

            "Don't say that. It sounded beautiful," she says.

Ville blushes, "I should hope so, my love. It was about you." Tatianna reaches for one of the pieces of paper Ville is always scrawling on. They look as if they've been torn out of his journal. She finds that the words are in Finnish, but her name keeps popping up amongst hasty chicken scratch, implicit signs of desperation from the heart leaking out as song.

            "I'm going over to Burton's in a bit. He said he'd help me straighten this mess out," Ville admits, still shy in the way he talks about the piece as Tatianna reads through it.

            "I-I was going to ask you to come sit atop the piano and be my inspiration. You don't have to sing or anything, I just want you to hear it all for the first time."

Butterflies rush up from the core of her stomach. She neatly collects the sheets and places them back on the counter, turning to face Ville. She kisses him as a response, his face anxious with anticipation. She would have done anything for him. His eyes are hopeful and excited when Tatianna breaks the kiss. She smiles at him, her eyes wet.

            "That's so sweet, V…it makes me want to cry." Ville's thumb caresses a tear that falls silently.

            "Tatia, I love you so much."

            "I know," she smiles, kissing his scruffy chin.

            " _Niin paljon_."

            "I know," she says again. Ville takes a deep breath. Her hands on his shoulders lower when he takes a knee in front of her. Tatianna's heart stops beating. Ville clasps her hand, for a moment as if he's trying to hold on for dear life. He pulls a small, black, velvet box out of his pocket, already wet in the eyes when he looks up at her. He smiles, looking afraid. She can barely hear the anxious Finnish tumbling from between his lips, her eyes glued on the biggest diamond ring she's ever personally seen when Ville opens the box. A silent gasp escapes her. Ville blinks back the tears, taking another breath before the question she's anticipating escapes his lips.

            "Menetkö naimisiin kanssani?"

His poor hand trembles holding hers. She would have thought Ville to be out of his mind if she didn't also already feel that she was out of her mind. The sheer shock leaves Tatianna at a loss for words.

            "Ole hyvä?" Ville practically begs. All she can do is nod. Ville sighs with utter relief. She had understood most of what he said, particularly the bit about regretting it for the rest of his life if he didn't ask, not wanting to let her go, that he isn't willing to wait for love any longer. He stays kneeling there on the floor after fitting the ring onto Tatianna's finger, kissing the back of her hand with the warmest lips. She kneels to Ville's height, taking him by surprise. There's a moment of silence, of understanding between them. And she throws her arms around him as he embraces her back.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I apologize if and when the Finnish is utterly incorrect. I've done my best to self teach and try to get things right, but unfortunately, I'm not as much of a polyglot as I wish and I don't have any friends who speak Finnish.

            Tatianna can feel the music vibrating through every fiber of her being. Ville's eyes are still locked on her as Burton flies away across the keys of his piano. Ville's voice is like an orgasm and Tatianna gets lost in his eyes, his fingers strumming his guitar with the most grace. She still feels like she's dreaming when her name rolls off his tongue. When the song ends, Burton laughs sweetly at the two of them lost in oeillades. He admits to being in a bit of disbelief at how quickly things have already progressed between them, but he had congratulated them all the same upon seeing Tatianna's ring. Ville stands, making his way to Tatianna on the piano.

            "What do you think?" he asks. His genuine nervousness makes her smile. Ville tugs at his shirt collar.

            " _Anything_ you sing sounds beautiful to me," she reassures him, pulling him close for a kiss. Ville had been afraid Tatianna would say no when he proposed. They haven’t known each other very long, but he figured that if she was willing to pick up her life and move to be with him, she must have felt as strongly as he does. He only hopes that his ex will remain un-included in their life once she finishes her article on the competition. He'd been to hell and back in love and with relationships, but Tatianna is simply _the one_. Ville doesn't know how he knows this, he just does. Not getting any younger, he decided to go for what he wants most in life, aside from having lived the dream of being a musician. He can already see Tatia growing old beside him and sharing their lives. It eases his soul when she wraps her arms around him.

            "How about a song for you two?" Burton asks. Ville laughs, placing his guitar atop the piano and pulling Tatianna off of it as Burton plays Je Te Veux. They dance stupidly across the room, Ville continuously spinning Tatianna in circles. Ville can't stop smiling, a sense of happiness unlike one he's ever felt before. When he insists on stopping by his parents to tell them the news, Tatianna doesn't stop blushing. He's relieved at how well his parents have received her, treating her as if she's their own daughter.

 

 

            "We have to plan this wedding now," he says, pulling her by the hand through his front door. Tatianna laughs.

            "Come, sit with me and look at all the girly things you want, because I couldn't care less about the decorations," he says excitedly, bringing his computer into the den where they spend most of their time. He sits, placing the computer on the coffee table and patting his lap. Tatianna kicks her shoes off and sits on Ville with a sigh. She starts to look at flowers and menus, asking Ville what the nicest places might be for their wedding.

            "I just realized, we have to tell _your_ family, too," he says, resting his chin atop her head.

            "Do you think they'd mind coming to Finland? Or maybe we should have it in Spain, so your grandparents don't have to travel. Oh—yes! In the summer it'll be nice and warm. I would hate for it to be cold."

            " _Slow down_ , Ville," Tatianna says, panting as if she's been running a race, gripping his arms where they're wrapped around her. He begins to laugh out loud, falling back against the couch. She can't help laughing too. Ville's long legs swoop up onto the couch and he reclines, pulling Tatianna down with him. He smiles up at her, pushing the hair out of her face.

            "You're going to be _all_ mine," he says, a devilish smile spreading across his angelic face, "Until death do us part, kultaseni." She sighs, resting her head on his chest.

            "Call all your friends and get them to be your bridesmaids. Jesse can be my best man, and the guys will be my groomsmen, of course." Ville goes on dreamily.

            "And we'll get fat and old together after we make many babies…"

Tatianna laughs. The excitement begins to tire her out, aside from Ville's hands stroking her back repeatedly, his voice reverberating against her ear. When she wakes, Ville is asleep. It's dark outside, and they have managed to turn over in their sleep, one of Ville's long arms lying heavily over Tatianna. His breath hits her face gently with every exhale. She sits up slowly to go and take a shower, kissing him on the cheek.

            She had forgotten all about Jelenä and that nonsense, letting the hot water soak through her pores. But when she's pulling the curtain back, Tatianna swears she can hear Jelenä's bitchy voice talking as if she's standing in the doorway. Tatianna finds Ville standing there, holding something, a hard look on his face. His arms are crossed, lips tight with anger, and he's staring at the floor. Ville rewinds the recording. Tatianna finds it strange to hear her own voice played back to her, "I'm saying that what you did to him in response was _wrong_." She's frozen in place, dripping wet with a towel wrapped around her.

            "Ville…I can explain."

He finally looks her in the eyes.

            "Tatianna, just tell me you didn't print this," he says calmly.

            "I didn't. I _wouldn't_."

Ville's eyes narrow a bit.

            "I'm not lying to you—I promise."

            "You said you had to interview her, but why'd this come up? Did your manager ask you to question her about our past?"

Tatianna is silent then. Ville takes a large step towards her into the bathroom.

            "Tatianna."

She sighs, closing her eyes when she speaks, "No one asked me anything like that. How did you even get your hands on—"

            "That's not important. Just tell me the truth," Ville says impatiently.

            "I took Jelenä's confession to the police. That's where I was…earlier today."

She finds it hard to look at him then. The betrayal he feels is tangible to her.

            "Ville, I swear I didn't put it in my article—I wouldn't do that to you—"

            "But you _did_ do something with it, didn't you?" She doesn't like the sound of Ville yelling at her. Her heart begins to crumble.

            "She got to me. And I didn't want to see her get away with this," Tatianna admits, her voice shaking a bit.

            "I told you I didn't want to do this. And you went behind my back and brought a confession to the police?"

            "She should pay for what she did to you. I don't care how long ago it was. Why does what I did upset you?"

            "Because I _told_ you, I didn't want anyone else knowing what I went through!"

            "I bet you still _love her_ —that’s why you'd rather not see her behind bars where she belongs!"

Ville is aghast by Tatianna's response. He stands there a few seconds, looking at her in disbelief before slamming the recorder down on the sink and marching out of the bathroom, slamming the door shut. Tatianna jumps, shaken up by the tension. Immediately, she regrets the last thing she said to Ville. She steps out of the shower, kicks the lid of the toilet down, sits there, and cries.

            When Tatianna emerges from the bathroom, she doesn't find Ville in his room, hers, or anywhere in the house. Realizing he's left, she gets dressed. She pauses at the basement door, which is open, the light still on.

            "Ville?" she calls down the stairs. No one answers. She sighs and starts down there, until she happens upon the washing machine, the door still open. Ville was about to wash their coats together. She realizes then that the recorder must have dropped out of her pocket when Ville was handling her coat. Maybe out of complete curiosity, he'd wanted to know what was really on it. Tatianna's eyes water as she presses the clothes into the machine and turns it on. She doesn't bother to text Ville or call him, knowing that he's so angry, he probably needs time to cool off. She wonders whether he went back to Burton's to tell him all about the horrible thing she's done. The thought makes her feel ashamed. Or perhaps Ville went to Jesse's. All she knows is that he's out there somewhere, upset that she did what she did. The worst part is, she didn’t even get to tell him that there's nothing the police can do about Jelenä unless he comes forward himself. Tatianna went on her own because she knew Ville wouldn't do it himself. But she also did it because she loves him. Just imagining the things that woman did to him hurt her to her soul.

            She stays up waiting for Ville to come back, falling asleep in the process. The sound of the front door closing wakes her from where she had drifted off on the couch in front of the TV. Ville walks past the doorway, not even sparing her a glance. She hears him drop his keys on the small table near the coat rack before he wanders into the kitchen. He had been gone all night, as she comes to find that it's almost noon the following day. Cautiously, Tatianna walks to the kitchen where Ville is moving things around. She finds his back to her as he rummages through the cabinets. He curses, beginning to shove things down, plastic containers falling all over the place. She keeps her distance. Clearly, he's still angry. He finds a bottle of aspirin and sighs with frustration as he twists the cap open.

            Tatianna approaches him and he stands still there for a few seconds, listening to her footsteps. The second she's close enough to touch him, she can smell the alcohol on him. It seems to be oozing out of his flesh. It isn't right; he's not drinking anymore. The fact that she had upset him _so_ much that he would relapse makes Tatianna cry afresh. Ville pushes the bottle of pills back into the cabinet, then turns around and walks right past her, not even sparing her a glance.

            "Ville," she calls without turning around. He continues on his way up the stairs. Tatianna hurries to the foot of the staircase, calling his name again. He never stops or responds to her in any manner. Frustration grows and she starts up the stairs after him. When she comes to find his bedroom door locked, she knocks. She starts slamming on it with her fists until he opens it. He stares her dead in the eyes. He speaks in Finnish, faster than she can accurately translate. He looks cross and sickly, and she hates smelling alcohol on his breath.

            "Talk to me," she interrupts him. He continues to say things that she can't understand, until it sounds like he's asking her questions. He steps towards her over the threshold, asking something angrily. Tatianna begins to step back, crossing her arms, shaking her head.

            "I don't understand. You know I don't—"

Ville's voice gets louder and he waves a hand in frustration, clearly agitated. He shakes his head before walking back into his room and closing the door. She hears it lock and decides to give up. She can't stomach trying to deal with him when he's like this. Too angry to cry anymore, Tatianna hurries down to the basement to put the laundry in the dryer. If Ville isn't so pissed off that he'll call off their engagement, she reasons that he's going to _have_ to talk to her sooner or later. At a loss and not knowing what else to do, she goes for a cold walk on her own. When she comes back, Ville still avoids speaking to her, and when she pesters him enough that he does, it's just frantic and angry Finnish. She realizes that this is far worse than the silent treatment, something guys have done to her in the past when they were arguing.

            Her frustration just gets worse, and Ville seemingly not caring only hurts more. When he's starting out of the house to a cab, she rushes in front of him.

            "Where are you going?" she asks him. When he tries to start around her, she blocks him, until he's so frustrated that he just stands there and stares at the sky, the sun setting.

            "Were you drinking all night?" she asks, afraid of the response he'll give her. He tells her in Finnish to go back into the house. Tatianna reaches her breaking point and starts to yell at him. She rambles on in her native tongue, hoping that just _maybe_ she can get under Ville's skin enough that he'll stop acting like a child. He retorts in Finnish, until they both realize they're just two idiots screaming unintelligible nonsense at each other on a frozen lawn. Ville cups Tatianna's face, catching her off guard. He looks upset and only asks her one question.

            " _Why?_ "

By now, the cab driver has stepped out of the car. Ville glances past Tatianna for a second, signaling for the driver to leave.

            " _Because I love you_!" she admits. His sadness deepens visibly, and he just starts to look ashamed.

            "You didn't have to drink," Tatianna says gently, her voice cracking. Ville releases her cheeks and shoves his hands into his pockets.

            "I didn't know what else to _do_ ," he admits, "You don't know how this makes me feel," he says, crossing his arms and looking away from her.

            "Everything I told you about Jelenä was in confidence. I never expected you, of all people, to betray my trust, Tatianna."

            "I wasn't trying to betray you—"

            "That's how it feels," Ville interrupts, giving her a glance.

            "You don't have to drink, though. I don't want you to relapse…you've been doing so well, and now it's my fault that you—"

            "Don't," he says, closing his eyes and swallowing hard, "I just need time to think about this."

            "What's there to think about, Ville? I _never_ did any of this to hurt you. I did it because I love you and I want that woman to pay for the harm she did to you."

            "If you were this hell-bent on getting back at my ex, you should have _talked_ _to_ _me_ —!"

            "And say what? I knew you didn't want to go to the police."

            "You _see_? _That's_ what I'm saying, Tatianna. You did _exactly_ what I didn't _want_ to do," Ville explains angrily.

            "Okay, well I would have preferred you stay here and yell at me instead of breaking your sobriety. Why didn't you just _talk_ to me—?"

            "Because this is how I've _always_ handled my problems! _Yes_ , I went to a bar—I got drunk. What do you _want_ me to say?! I'm sorry? I'm an alcoholic? You're engaged to a fucking alcoholic?! Is that what you want to hear?" It barely even sounds like Ville anymore. Tatianna's crying in response begins to make him feel badly. He sighs. She walks around him and back into the house before either of them can say anything else that's hurtful. Ville sighs again, sitting on the front steps in the cold. He weeps quietly for a while. He knows he fucked up, royally. All he wants to do is call that driver back, go into the city, and drink himself blind. But he thinks about the woman crying upstairs in his house, so he stays put.

 

            Tatianna spends the first night living at Ville's house in her own room. She hasn't slept in this bed before, but it's still neatly made with the new comforter Ville bought her that day at Ikea. Everything has his essence all over it, and she can smell him while she cries herself to sleep. She'd heard him come up the stairs at some point and swore he stopped at her door, and never came in. She doesn't know what to say to him, if he'll even give her a moment long enough to get out a complete sentence. Tatianna is surprised when she wakes up to the sensation of being held. She lies there a moment, wondering whether she's dreaming, but the warmth of Ville's arm around her is clearly real. She can tell from his breathing that he's asleep. She peels the quilt back a little bit to find his hand there around her stomach. To Tatianna's relief, Ville doesn't smell like alcohol.

            Maybe he's sorry. She imagines him sneaking into the room and habitually tucking his tall self behind her frame, the way they always sleep. Ville couldn't sleep knowing she was still crying. He'd tried to manage on his own and just couldn't. She was asleep by the time he went into her room, but he didn't want her to wake up alone. He didn't want to wake up alone either. After their fight on his lawn, he felt that he had failed. When Tatianna used the word "relapse," it scared him. The last time he'd had that much trouble with alcohol, he was still in a relationship with Jelenä. He doesn't want to go back there, turn into that person again, be a slave to the bottle.

           Tatianna had admitted she'd rather him yell at her than turn to drinking. He realized, while tossing in his own bed, how much she truly loves him. He regrets making her upset, making her cry like that. At the same time, she had to understand why he was upset. What had hurt him even more was the fact that she'd even thought he possibly still loved Jelenä. That’s what triggered him to want to drink again. But why would Tatianna agree to marry him if she really thought he had feelings for his ex? He had to wonder if it was just something she'd said out of hurt during their fight.

            He had wanted to tell her everything, but instead let his anger get the better of him. And yet, she's still there, asleep in his arms, right where she belongs. Tatianna fidgets with the ring on her finger, and smiles. She doesn't enjoy fighting with Ville, but if they'll always make up, if their love always wins in the end, she'd fight with him and stay. She lies there until the urge to pee is unbearable. When she comes back, Ville is looking out the window tiredly, sitting in bed. He turns to look at Tatianna, who stands in the doorway unsurely for a moment. She starts towards the bed, and as soon as her knees hit it, Ville buries his face in her chest.

            "I'm sorry," he says with a strained voice, "I was so stupid. I shouldn't have—"

            "It's okay. It's okay."

He clings to her tightly as she rubs his hair soothingly.

            "I'll never drink again…it turns me into an asshole," he says, wiping his eyes. Tatianna's voluptuous lips kissing his face take away the shame.

            "Please, Tatia, don't let me _ever_ do that again," he begs, "I can't fall apart again. I just can't. I won't do that to you."

            "You're okay. Shhh."

Ville relaxes. After a moment's silence, Tatianna speaks.

            "I spoke with one police officer—that's all. And I can't do anything about Jelenä abusing you if you won't come forward yourself. I never wanted to hurt you…and I'll let it go if you want me to stop chasing it."

Ville looks down at Tatianna, sitting up to his full height.

            "Well…is that what you really want, baby? Will it make you happy if I do something about Jelenä?"

Tatianna nods.

            "Okay. I'll do it."

            "…Ville…"

            "It _is_ important. And you're right. It's time I stop feeling guilty about all of the things I did in the past. I never _deserved_ to be abused, no matter how much of an asshole I was at one time or another. And I _never_ laid a hand on that woman, or anyone."

            "Are you sure?"

Ville nods before kissing Tatianna's forehead.

            "We shouldn't be fighting…we should be celebrating. We're about to spend the rest of our lives together. I want to start things off on the right foot."

Tatianna smiles, falling back into Ville's arms.

            "Let's go out, kulta. I have a surprise for you."

Wondering what on earth Ville could have pulled together on such short notice, Tatianna smiles with curiosity.

 

            Tatianna stands outside somewhere, laughing, Ville's warm hands covering her eyes. He had told her to close her eyes as the cab rolled down a final street, and had kept his hands over her eyes, leading her to the surprise.

            "Okay, can I look now?" she asks. Ville laughs.

            "That depends. Are you ready for anything?" he asks.

She shivers a moment, and not just because of the cold. Ville's voice is enticing.

            "Just let me see!" she pleads. He laughs, counting out loud.

            "One, two…"

            " _Ville!_ "

            "Free! Surprise," he says, uncovering Tatianna's eyes. She stares up at Aikuisten Lelukauppa in the drizzling that has begun to come down from the sky. She has seen this store only online. To stand outside of it for real makes her tremble with excitement. She turns around to look at Ville, who's blushing deeply.

            "Do you like it?" he asks.

            "I dunno. I haven't seen the inside yet."

Ville clasps her hand, opening the door and allowing Tatianna to walk through it. Expecting to see his father there, Ville looks on with anticipation. Instead, he is greeted by a woman with short black hair. She tells Ville that his father is running errands.

            "Kiitos. Have a look around, my love," Ville says. There are dildos, butt plugs, and vibrators as far as the eye can see. Tatianna starts down an aisle, looking for the HIM handcuffs she'd heard about. The woman who had greeted them when they came in asks whether they're looking for anything in particular.

            "I'm just showing my fiancée around," Ville explains. Tatianna pauses to grin back at him. This is the first time she's heard him call her this around someone he doesn't know. He winks at her and she blushes. Ville follows her as she looks at the toys and giggles a bit. She picks up something much too large to be taken seriously and crams it against Ville's chest, successfully stifling a laugh. Ville blushes.

            "My darling, I don't believe you could handle that," he says, reading the label before putting it back where Tatianna had found it. He clasps her hip from behind as she flips through some smut DVDs. Ville leans over her shoulder.

            "Ooo. That might be a bit fun to watch, huh baby?"

He kisses her ear and she almost moans out loud. When she happens upon what looks like a g-spot vibrator, she picks it up. The item was on display, outside of the box. She presses a button that turns it on. When she turns around to find Ville looking inside a glass case of leather whips, she sneaks up on him. She dips the tip of the toy between his shoulder blades and he jumps unsuspectingly, turning around with wide eyes. He laughs. Tatianna runs the toy down his stomach, stopping at his crotch. She pushes the toy against him through his pants and he gasps, his eyes widening as he leans towards her. He backs away and Tatianna rushes forth with the toy again, pressing him in the groin relentlessly.

            "Put that back…Oh. Hehehe… _oh_." Ville laughs, but the laughs turn into moans of pleasure. He grabs her wrist, blushing around the neck furiously.

            "Tha-that's…" he can't even finish his sentence, staring down at Tatianna unsurely. She presses the vibrator up against Ville's junk again, observing his face, the eyes wide with what looks like amazement. And instead of pulling her hand away, Ville's grip stays strong, keeping Tatianna's hand in place. She laughs. Ville's eyes roll closed and he inhales sharply, sighing with a quiet groan. Tatianna clicks the toy off and Ville's eyes pop open. He looks at her with a sort of desperation and she laughs; he'd gotten hard almost instantly. His hand already grows sweaty around her wrist. His green eyes flit back and forth until he spots something in the near distance. Leaning over a stack of dirty movies, Ville checks to see that the cashier is involved with another customer. Tatianna teases him playfully with the vibrator again, gliding it over his stomach and circling around his tip, which she can see through his sweatpants.

            He inhales sharply, grabbing Tatianna's hand and causing her to drop the sex toy. The next thing she knows, he's practically dragging her towards a door with a sign on it that reads employees only. Ville's hand comes down hard over Tatianna's bottom and she giggles, nearly screaming. Ville's other hand clamps down over her mouth as he presses her against a wall.

            "You _bad_ , _bad_ girl," he breathes against the back of her head, "Now I _need_ you." Ville pulls her pants down so fast that she nearly topples over. He turns her around, shushing her and pulling her legs up to meet his waist. She didn't even hear him pull his own pants down. Tatianna groans at his sudden entrance.

            "Shhh," he says, laughing ever so quietly. When he starts fucking her hard, she can't exactly keep quiet. Ville pauses, pressing her into the wall.

            "Be quiet. This is all your fault, kulta," he says, trying to keep a straight face. She can barely keep from laughing. Ville's moans are quiet, but she can still hear him. Thankful that there's music on in the shop, she hopes the cashier is none the wiser of what they're doing in the back. The roughness with which Ville takes her makes it near impossible to keep silent. Tatianna pulls his hair, pawing at his back as he fucks her into oblivion. They reach a hasty but satisfying climax together, Ville trembling on his feet, squeezing Tatianna's thigh. She clings to him a moment, reveling in the sensations all over and inside her body. Ville had never spanked her before, but she liked it. He gently stands Tatianna on her feet, eyes still wide and lively, catching his breath. Tatianna leans on him to slip her shoes back on. Ville caresses her rear, grabbing at it, groaning under his breath. His cum drips warmly down her inner thigh and she smiles to herself, laughing quietly.

            "You made me do it," Ville states finally having caught his breath.

            "I think we should buy that toy," she says, fastening her belt as Ville pulls his pants up. He smiles at her lasciviously.

            "You totally liked it," Tatianna adds. He laughs. Before exiting the shop, Ville tucks the toy inside Tatianna's purse, thankful that he didn't purchase it directly from his own father. Tatianna enjoyed seeing him like that, in all honesty. He blushes the entire ride home.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lovey dovey endings. I'm a sucker for them. My birthday is in less than an hour (February 4th).

            "Oh, my sweet baby," Ville moans, stretching out long across his bed. Tatianna never tasted cherry flavored condoms before. The moment is just as pleasurable for her as it is for Ville. She'd grabbed the condoms last minute off a random shelf back at Aikuisten Lelukauppa. Ville's hands knot into Tatianna's hair, and she feels the muscles of his stomach flex under her fingers as he sits up slightly. She sucks him hard and he gasps, placing both hands on her shoulders, almost as if trying to hold her together.

            "Not so hard, kulta—you're gonna make me— _ooohhhh_." Tatianna smiles around his member without teeth. Ville sits up, panting.

            "Minun hyvä pikkutyttö," he says, cradling Tatianna's head in his fingers. Listening to Ville sighing, calling her all kinds of sweet nothings, makes Tatianna wet. Ville pulls her up abruptly then.

            "That's enough," he says with a dirty grin, pulling the condom off himself and tugging at Tatianna's underwear. She giggles a bit as Ville struggles with them, sitting her bare naked across his lap as he pulls them down her shins.

            "I need to finish inside you," he says in one breath, guiding her on top of him. He slides in with ease, and Tatianna throws her head back, grasping at Ville's shoulders. Their little stint in the shop less than an hour prior was too short lived. Ville wanted to revel in touching every part of her with easier access than when Tatianna was only half naked. He squeezes a breast, looking pleasantly between her hips, watching himself disappear within Tatianna's wet folds. She admires him at all times, but the most while he's fucking her, strands of brunette clinging to his angelic face, teeth barred with almost pained sounds of delight at her tightness. Ville gazes up into Tatianna's eyes, wrapping her in his arms. She rubs against him, bringing herself closer to climax. She comes in his embrace and Ville allows her to fall back, until he's lying comfortably on top of her, the gushing sensation of a part of his soul spurting out of his body and passing into her nearly paralyzing him.

            A small squeak-like sound alerts Ville to Tatianna. He finds her eyes streaming uncontrollably. Terrified, he pulls out, hovering over her.

            "Good god—did I hurt you?" he asks breathlessly, but when she's already pulling him back the moment he got up, he doesn't need words to know she's perfectly fine. She smiles in ecstasy, overwhelmed. Ville cradles her head in his hands again, kissing about her face, relaxing. Dried cum from countless sensual sessions grazes his knee across the quilt. The air is thick with her scent. He could have stayed wrapped up with her and died happily. She runs her hands through his hair repeatedly.

            "You're so perfect," Ville breathes, kissing her chest sweetly. He begins massaging Tatianna's breasts. Her eyes are closed with content.

            "That was just _so_ good," she finally says, rubbing her eyes. Ville smiles. _Good enough that she broke down in tears!_

            "Glad to hear it."

            "Have we settled who will be your bridesmaid?" Ville asks.

            "I made a call home that night we…"

Tatianna looks down at Ville, trailing off, negative emotions coming back. Ville pauses in kissing to look up at her.

            "Mmmh, well I haven't told my mom yet. And since my father passed away, I don't know who the heck will walk me down the aisle."

Ville sits up in bed, bringing Tatianna with him.

            "I'm so sorry, love. I completely forgot about that…I can ask my dad. I'm sure he'd be honored."

Tatianna smiles lightly.

            "Yeah? How does that sound?" he asks, stroking her cheek. She nods. He kisses her.

            "Well, you spoke to your mom but you didn't tell her we're engaged?"

            "…It was…sort of a sad phone call," Tatianna explains, not knowing what to say. She'd just hated fighting with Ville and needed to talk to someone who understood her.

            "She tried to convince me to come home. That I shouldn't be with you."

Ville's heart pangs painfully.

            "I'm sorry," she says quietly.

            "There's nothing to be sorry about. I should never have yelled at you…I should never have reacted the way I did when all you wanted was to help me…I _love_ you, Tatia. I'd be disappointed if your mum would never want to meet me, but it's not going to stop me from marrying you."

            "She doesn't even _know_ you. I _told_ her to stop reading the tabloids," Tatianna explains, sighing with frustration. To her surprise, Ville laughs.

            "Well, I _want_ to marry you, whether my mother approves or not. It's my life, isn't it?"

Ville kisses her shoulder.

            "Whatever you want, you will have my darling. I want my wife to be happy at all times," Ville explains. Tatianna blushes.

            "So, you thought about going to the police to talk about Jelenä?"

            "I have. I told you I'd do it, and I meant it."

Tatianna hugs him tightly.

            "I get out of work around two tomorrow. We can go together then," she explains.

            "Okay, babe. I'll take you to late lunch afterwards."

Things get easier as the week begins. But to Tatianna's dismay, the most that Jelenä ends up with is community service and a bit of damage to her name. In Ville's mind, he's just happy that he can finally put that part of his past to bed once and for all.

 

            "That's enough, Jesse," Ville explains, prying Tatianna away from his little brother, just as she's about to go for a kick, "I'd like to have an _intact_ wife on my wedding day, thank you."

Migé laughs, taking another swig of beer. Jesse hadn't been kidding about showing Tatianna some Muay Thai moves. Ville's heart swells as she topples back on the couch laughing, falling between Linde and Burton. It's the first party he's ever hosted in his new home, his and Tatianna's engagement. It's worth celebrating, something he knows he'll never forget. They had finished planning the wedding in the space of a little over two weeks, and Ville is relieved that Tatianna's girlfriends have agreed to come to Finland for the ceremony.

            Linde had been speaking to one of Tatianna's beautiful friends for almost a complete ten minutes, and Ville hopes that soon he'll be planning a bachelor's party for his quiet friend; Sofia needed more female figures in her life. Tatianna meets up with Ville in the kitchen to get more drinks. Ville wraps his arms around her where she stands at the island counter. She laughs.

            "I _already_ miss you," Ville complains, burying his face in her hair. This is the last night they will spend together before his bachelor party and her bachelorette party.

            "Mi amor, patience is a virtue."

            "Not when we're destined to spend _every_ — _waking_ — _moment_ together," Ville says, teasing the nape of her neck with kisses. She rubs his hand at her waist.

            "It won't be long," she promises, turning around to kiss him. It had been difficult trying to convince Tatianna that he could handle everyone else drinking during their party and at their wedding while going without, but he's managed and the party is almost over. He had let Tatianna handle all of the alcohol, never even physically touching a bottle. Whenever the thought of taking a drink occurs to Ville, he thinks about everything he stands to lose, and the thought dissipates almost as soon as it popped into his head. She promised Ville she'd never let him drink again, and she hasn't failed yet.

            "I think Linde fancies your friend Alessandra," Ville laughs. Tatianna giggles, turning around with some beers in her hands.

            "Well, it would do Sofia some good to have a woman around, would it not?"

            "My thoughts exactly, baby."

 

            Migé quite literally lifts Ville up off his feet to get him away from Tatianna when the morning before their wedding arrives. Ville giggles, to Tatianna's delight, finally letting go of her hand.

            "Just because I can't see you doesn't mean we can't talk. Text me!" Ville calls, as Migé shoves him into his car and drives off. Tatianna's girlfriends stand in Ville's door, laughing. Ville had left his home to his wife-to-be and her bridesmaids for their bachelorette party. It had been a while since Ville spent proper time just being one of the dudes, without the company of a female. Linde's basement still smells the same to Ville as he sits on a sofa, strumming his guitar, singing to Sofia, who has started drifting off. He kisses the sleeping girl on the cheek before digging into his pocket for his phone to see if Tatia had texted him. She'd sent him a few sweet nothings, accompanied by a photograph of herself with her best friends, enjoying his hot tub and doing each other's nails. Ville smiles.

            "You're not supposed to see the bride yet," Linde informs, rolling his eyes. Jesse laughs around a bottle of beer.

            "You can't help him—he's _obsessed_ ," Jesse adds.

            "Everybody be quiet. The baby is sleeping," Ville says, nodding his head at Sofia. Some bachelor party. But Ville had adamantly reiterated that he didn’t want anything crazy—no strippers, no bars, and no surprises. Linde's cell phone begins to ring and he immediately silences it.

            "Finally. That'll be Sof's mum," he says, standing and picking her up off the couch. Ville fights the urge to laugh. She's not so small anymore, but Linde manages to carry her up the stairs and to the car waiting outside.

            "There. Now we can talk like men," Burton mumbles. Jesse laughs, crashing on the couch beside Ville and stealing the guitar.

            "So, is the sex good?"

            "Excuse me?" Ville says absently, tucking his phone away at last.

            "If the sex is good, the marriage will last," Burton explains, flashing his ring finger at Ville. Ville rolls his eyes. Burton proceeds to talk about his wife, Jesse and Migé growing red around the collar.

            "Honestly, we don't need that _level_ of _detail_ , Burton," Ville explains, fighting a smile, "If you think I'm going to share any information regarding the _holiness_ that is Tatianna's body—even with my boys—you're delusional," Ville explains, yawning. Burton shrugs.

            "Just wondering. There was a ton of photos of you two leaving your dad's shop in Helsinki a while ago. I thought you should know, people are rumoring that you're bad in bed and that's why you guys were there."

Ville shakes his head, laughing.

            "I've heard _that one_ before. I can confidently say it isn't true! She just hated me, that lady. Oh, shit…what _was_ her name? I don't even…?" Ville scratches his head, trying to remember his ex at the time he'd first heard this rumor. Migé nearly falls out of his chair laughing. Jesse strums Beat It so well that Ville turns to watch him for a minute. Linde makes his way back down the stairs, popping a bottle of cider.

            "We all promised the misses you wouldn’t have a hangover on your wedding day, so you'd better drink this disgusting sparkling juice we bought you." Ville laughs through his nose, raising an empty glass off the table. To his relief, it's not as bad as he'd feared it would be.

            "I wonder how long this will last," Migé says curiously, cocking a brow and staring at Ville.

            "Guys…I love her. If I have to give up drinking to spend the rest of my life with her, I can."

            "Awww," his friends coo collectively.

            "You've no idea what she does to me…She's worth it. Every day. We had this horrible fight the other day, and naturally, I reacted like this childish little kid, went and got shitfaced. I can't make her cry like that again. It was so _stupid_."

Jesse rubs Ville's shoulder comfortingly.

            "Anyway, I already know her mum can't stand me. She reads the bloody tabloids. I don't want Tatia to hate me too."

            "About that, is the mysterious mother-in-law coming to the wedding?" Burton asks, flipping the cap of a fresh beer across the room, landing it on the table.

            "Tatia just found out last week—she _is_. I've seen some pictures and _wow_. I swear, she doesn't look a day over thirty."

Linde laughs, "Spanish women, Ville. You lucky ass bastard."

            "Oh, _please_ don't get a hard-on when you're standing next to me at the altar. I'm gonna remind Tatia to have her friends dressed in potato sacks."

Linde blushes.

            "But seriously, do you think her friend Alessandra is interested in single dads?" Linde asks somewhat shyly. Ville throws a pillow at him.

 

            At the altar, Ville can't stop pulling on his collar. He curses when a strand of hair falls out of place from where he'd spent far too much time gelling it back that morning. Jesse places a cold hand around the back of Ville's neck and tells him to stop fidgeting so fucking much. Ville clears his throat, searching the sea of faces, some of which are unfamiliar, but remind him of Tatianna's olive tan and warm eyes. She'd convinced her mother to come, and Ville can easily distinguish her from Tatianna's aunts and uncles, who sit in the front row smiling like it’s the best day of their lives.

            Tatianna's nerves almost get the better of her. When her mom came to visit her right before the ceremony, smiling, she was happy to see that she still at least had faith in her that she was making the right choice. Her mother hasn't even met Ville yet, but Tatianna knows she'll like him when she does. She's thankful to have her mother's blessing, and in her heart, hopes that her father is watching from somewhere better. By the time Tatianna stands at the end of the aisle, Ville's father holding her arm and telling her she doesn't have to be nervous, that she's in good hands, her eyes start to well up immediately. Everything looks so perfect that she can't help wondering if this is a dream, but as Kari leads her closer to the love of her life, she knows it's 100% real. When Tatianna sees Ville's face through her veil, she can already  tell that he's in tears, a genuine smile that she'll never forget plastered on his beautiful face. Both hands reach up, shaking, to cover his mouth as he takes in the sight of her. A unanimous _awww_ floods the hall. Alessandra runs up from her spot beside the altar, pulling a small packet of tissues out of what seems like nowhere. Ville's hearty laugh is music to Tatianna's ears as her best friend dabs at his green eyes, Jesse slapping him on the back with a huge smile.

            Ville's father unveils Tatianna for a kiss, wishing her luck before resuming his seat beside Ville's mother. Ville's hands are warm and soft when they clasp Tatianna's. Standing there, just inches away from her beauty, Ville physically fights the urge to kiss her immediately. He didn't know he was going to cry. She's just so beautiful that it hit him hard knowing she's about to give herself to him until the end of time. There's nothing quite like the butterflies in his stomach then. Tatianna is stronger, having held her tears back successfully. He mouths to her that he loves her and she can't even hear the priest when he begins the sermon. For the sake of everyone understanding, the ceremony is held in English. Ville's hands are so steady now, unlike when he proposed, as he slips a perfect gold band onto Tatianna's finger. They exchange I dos hastily, longing to jump into each other's arms.

            Ville decides to go all out, making the moment memorable by dipping Tatianna low to the ground for their first matrimonial kiss. Knowing that he's the only one who can hear her moan while their families and friends applaud the union gets Tatianna excited. Already, she awaits her wedding night. Ville's grip around her waist is tight as they start down the aisle, pink and yellow rose petals being thrown every which way. During their first dance, Ville only understands some of the words being sung in their ears, but he knows they're about love and everything that he feels in that moment, holding Tatianna close to him. He'd let her pick most of the music, not caring much about the details, but he did plan on surprising her by playing a new song he'd written about her. And he can't get over the awe on her face as she stands there, clutching her mother's hands, watching Ville sing on a stage with his acoustic.

            By the time they are Jamaica-bound on a jet, Ville can barely keep his eyes open. Tatianna runs her hand through his hair, which has practically come completely ungelled. He smiles at her tiredly, continuing to sing the most sappy of love songs at random.

            "You should have gone to bed early," she states, fighting a laugh. Ville clutches her tighter.

            "I was too excited, thinking about this moment," he explains, closing his eyes. Tatianna's full lips meet each eyelid lingeringly. Ville groans with satisfaction, pulling Tatianna into his lap. He looks up at her before opening the window of the jet. The moon is visible and they stare at it momentarily.

            "My love, what is your wedding gift to me?" Ville asks curiously, having forgotten all about it. His gift to Tatianna had been the song that he sang her, one she'd never heard before. She sighs shyly and Ville looks up at her, pushing his hands through her hair, relieving it of the bobby pins that were keeping a few styled curls in place.

            "Do you really want it now?" she asks, blushing. Ville grins slyly.

            "It can't be sex, honey. We're going to be having _that_ until we're so old we might break our hips."

Tatianna laughs genuinely. Ville's warm hands cup her cheeks.

            "Really, my love, what did you get for me?"

Tatianna places a hand nervously on Ville's chest.

            "Sweetheart?" he lifts her chin. She laughs, closing her eyes.

            "Well, I can't exactly _give_ it to you just yet," she mumbles. Ville sits up in his seat, tilting his head to the side. Tatianna sighs, leaning back on Ville's legs to create some space between them and redirecting his hands to her stomach. She places them there, waiting and watching his expression hopefully. It takes a second for Ville to realize what she's waiting on him to understand. He just about jumps out of his chair.

            "A…a baby?!"

Tatianna laughs at the width of his green eyes.

            "You're pregnant?!" She nods, covering her mouth with both hands. Ville is so excited that she grabs her camera off the small table and photographs him smiling at her stomach.

            "I found out literally two nights ago. I wanted to tell you right away, but then I decided it might be a cuter surprise to wait till this day."

            "Oh, Tatia…" he's at a loss for words, gazing up at her with watery eyes. She hasn't seen him so happy before.

            "You happy?" she asks, placing the camera down.

            "Oh, baby. _Of course_. I can't believe this…" Ville wipes his tears of joy. With relief, Tatianna rests her head atop Ville's. His grip is full of something real, something she could never do without. He kisses her neck sweetly and whispers into her ear, "Elämäni rakkaus."


End file.
